Bipolar Problems

For most of my life (since i was 7 or 8ish), I have lived on a cycle. I would be happy or somewhat happy or well off in some sort, then you can say things intensify, as in life is perfect, then after say a month or two of being on top of the world (not exactly legal stuff). I wouldnt say drug use is the problem for i moderate it to some degree. My bipolarness leads me to crash into a period of extreme depression where nothing feels good. This down feeling usually lasts 1-4 months before I slowly get over it and get well off again, then things get better, then im on top and crash again. The past 2 years I have had 5 crashes at different times for different reasons. My coping mechanisms include:
-moderate alcohol use
-moderate marijuana use
-moderate masturbating
-small network of friends who kiss my ass but i dont rely on them to any sort (trust them either)

I want to break the bipolar cycle and live normally, meds are an option but I want that to be a last resort same with counciling.

Sorry if I'm vague on some details please ask, my bipolar cycle just crashed last night and I had 14 hours laying in bed doing nothing (common bipolar thing)

 

I can't really help you, but I do often question if I have Bipolar or not.

I can sort of relate to you, but mine are usually in more common 'bursts'. For example, one minute I will be feeling happy and calm. The next minute I will feel really angry and frustrated, and just feel uncomfortable and pissed off for no apparent reason.

I'm not really sure why it happens, but it evidently has serious effects on my life. For example, if I get a sudden 'burst' of anger and then someone comes over to talk to me, I will be really snappy with them and tell them to go away or not to talk to me.

Then a few minutes later, I'll go and find them and apologise and ask them what they wanted to say. I don't know why it happens, it just does.

This also adds to the extreme social awkwardness that I own. If I'm talking with someone who I don't know that well, or haven't known for a long time, I'm extremely fidgety and nervous/shy for no reason. I find it very difficult to make eye contact with people that aren't very close to me and see on a day to day basis.

If I try to force myself to make eye contact, I always worry that I seem weird to them. If I try to look them in the eye, I always end up staring deep into their eyes, then it makes me feel as if I am making them feel uncomfortable.


I know I've gone really off topic here, but I wonder if you experience any of these problems also, or if anyone could help me out too (Sorry for the hijack )

 

Im similair in that sense where like you say happy one minute pissy the next. Im more focused on the cycles, look up bipolar on wiki. it has episodes or periods of time where one emotion in prominant or watev. I read somewhere you dont enjoy company either, me too. i seclude my self way to much but im somewhat social

 

There are a select few that I enjoy the company of and prefer to be with than not. Other than that, I don't really like people. People annoy me, I also tend to pick out the bad features in people which probably doesn't help.

A lot of stuff really gets to me though, I'm extremely emotional and over reactive, even though I usually don't show it, inside I usually feel completely different to what my actions suggest.

When I went into further detail in a thread of my own a while ago, Farcast and one other said it may be Bipolar disorder, although I haven't seen or talked to anyone about it since.

 

I been in the exact situation you are in, don't even deny it.. It's the narcotics you are consuming and guilt. If you want go see a psychiatrist he will either tell you it is the narcotics or he's gonna say you are bipolar (or close to it),which you ARE NOT trust me, I thought I had anxiety disorder, but I didn't, and it was hell for me for months and months until I quit marijuana and tobacco. DO NOT listen to people saying, oh its natural with marijuana it will go away, actually, the more marijuana you will use the longer it lasts (learned that from experience, not by some anti-drug propaganda telling me so). Idk about alcohol, just limit it by a lot, don't get drunk, and STOP marijuana, I found it extremely hard to stop, because I hung out with lots of people that do it, and remember this, you will start wanting to do other shit like LSD, and then you will feel horrible, and WILL get addicted, now there are a lot of people saying marijuana is not addictive, haha yeah it is, because you want to get either that feeling again then reflecting on it when your sober (that's why I did it) but look, you are hurting your lungs and you probably cannot get a job, and the more times you will do it the worse and longer your cycles are going to be, and if you get anxious or something talk to friends about it, and if you are close with your parents, tell them too, I had to face it some time ago, and it was not easy at all, In fact I had delusions that I thought if i talk to my parents I was gonna die or something. And then I saw a doctor which checked my blood for chemical imbalances, and they also gave me meds and a shitload of benzys (xanax), and I had the rebound thing, in which, when the meds wore off, I had such bad anxiety, basically my mood went so beyond my control I wanted to run away. Then finally I told my doctor these pills aren't gonna solve anything and she said it's alright if I want to stop, so I did, told my parents about what I felt when I was having a panic/anxiety attack, ever since then I been more active and done a lot more things, and whatever these people on sythe say, "oh yeah you are definitely bipolar", thats just gonna make you feel worse, and if you start researching (googling) bipolar disorder and other things, that is gonna make you think you have it, which makes your condition a LOT worse. Anyways, one thing I can tell you is, it will get better, I thought my mood swings weren't going to get better either, and they have passed. Think this of it, It's just of growing up, but still, quit the marijuana, and at least limit the alcohol, if you need anymore help or something pm me or add my msn [email protected]

Edit: Oh, sorry my misunderstanding, you had it since 7 years old, still marijuana makes the mood swings more intense and they may last longer, try and quit for a month or two and see what happens.

 

To me, it just seems like you've self-diagnosed this by looking up symptoms on Wikipedia. It's easy to talk yourself in to having a severe mental condition when in reality you probably don't. You really have to cut out any narcotics like alcohol, drugs etc. from your life, as they are probably the main contributors to your mood swings. Everyone has mood swings and bad moments in their life.

If you really think you're bipolar, I suggest getting this diagnosed by a psychiatrist ASAP. I was diagnosed with depression a while ago, so I'm not just talking from no experience here.

 

Bipolar is quite unheard of, and is extremely hard to diagnose. In fact, some people still believe it is a myth, an excuse for those who are a little over reactive at times, for those who are more emotional than others.

If I recall correctly, statistics say 1 in 93 american adults have been diagnosed with Bipolar disorder, making it fairly common and therefore can easily be mistaken.

 

Listen to Verts, this is what I've been through also. And if you talked yourself into it, just try really hard to talk yourself out, it will help.

 

To me, it looks like the diagnosis gets thrown about alot.

Take into fact psychology is based on 'facts' various men and women have created to try and explain the way we think/act etc.

On topic, drugs will affect your mood, and so will drinking. Try and cut down, and see what affect that has on your mood swings. Verts pretty much covered everything anyway.