Some Jokes (18+)

Joke #1 A boy sees his parents having sex and asks what they are doing and they respond "We Are Making Cakes."
That night the boy opened his room and downstairs saw his parents having "it."

In the morning the boy walks up to his parents and says "I know what you were doing last night."
The mom says "What."
"You guys were making cakes," The Boy said.
"How did you know the mom replied."

I licked the frosting off the couch.

Joke #2:
A boy hears his mom scream fuck because she cut herself while cutting the Turkey for Thanksgiving. "What Does that Word Mean he asks."
"It's a way of cutting a turkey," his mom replied.
Then the boy goes upstairs and hears his dad scream "shit" while shaving.
The boy asks "What does that word mean"
"It's a type of shaving cream," the dad replied
Then a mailman rings the doorbell and the boy opens the door.
The mailman asks the boy if he can have his parents signature and he replies
"My mom is fucking the turkey and my dad has shit all over his face."

 

Nice copy paste. Not to mention it has shitty grammar. It's not even funny or mature.

 

Well said, pointless thread tbh.

 

/+1

More like right click copy , right click Paste.


@topic nice jokes lol.

 

Funny, indeed

 

Somewhat funny.


AND PHINAL U R LIEK 5 WUT R U DOIN ON DIS TREAD?

 

Hhh
not that funny or original
just disgusting tbh

 

That’s because you’re like 10.

OT, herd before and could have used better grammer.

 

Shitty jokes told badly.. What could go wrong.

 

Made me laugh i must say

 

Didn't find either funny tbh.

 

THE BASTARD KING OF ENGLAND

Oh, the minstrels sing of an English King of many long years ago
Who ruled his land with an iron hand though his mind was weak and low.
He love to shag the royal stag that roamed the royal wood,
But better yet to lie in bed and pull the royal pud.
His only outer garment was a dirty undershirt
That managed to hide the royal pride but couldn't hide the dirt.

Chorus:
He was wild and woolly and full of fleas
And his terrible tool hung down to his knees---
God bless the Bastard king of England.

Oh, the Queen of Spain was an amorous Jane,
And a sprightly dame was she;
Who loved to fool with the royal tool
Of the King across the sea.
So she sent a royal message by a royal messenger
To ask the King to bring his ding and spend a night with her.
(Cho.)

When Philip of France heard this, by chance
He declared, before his court:
"The Queen prefers my rival, because my dong is short."
So he sent the Count of Zippity-Zap to slip the Queen a dose of
the clap
To pass it to the Bastard King of England. (Cho.)

When the King of England heard of this, he was walking through his halls
And he up and swore by the royal whore that he'd have the Frenchman's balls
He offered up both half his lands and a piece of the Queen Hortense
To any British subject who'd de-nut the King of France. (Cho.)

Well the Earl of Sussex heard of this and straight-aways went to
France
Where he swore he was a fairy, so the King let down his pants,
He knotted a thong around that prong, and jumped on his horse, and rode along
And dragged him to the bastard king of England. (Cho.)
When the King of England saw this sight, he shit all over the floor,
For during the ride, his rival's pride had stretched a yard or more
Then the merry maids of England, came down from London town
And shouted 'round the castle walls "To Hell with the British crown!"

And Philip of France usurped the throne, his scepter was the royal bone
By which he'd bitched the bastard King of England! (Cho.)

 

did not laugh

 

I chuckled to the first one, second wasn't funny. Maybe next time.

 

Wow stop posting bad comments about my grammar. First of all I'm Russian. Second of all I don't give a shit. Stop being nerds and looking at my grammar. Just enjoy the joke.

 

tl;dr