level 129 account giveaway........

Lol 2nd story..
So my dad was rlly pissed at the people across the road cause their lawn is filled with weeds and they r spreading to ours, and if you lived where I live, the main road coming into the city is disgusting because dandelions ect.. So he calls 311, says hey, can you tell this guy to fuckin clean up his lawn a bit? The guy on the other line says, what does it look like, so my dad said.. Well it kinda looks like the city property. I have more but I'm on ipod

 

here let's give this a try
yo momma's so fat..

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V55Zq5whVCI

try to watch this without laughing.

 

comon give me it, im poor as a fukin homeless boy, i go outside everyday as i start out the day, thinking of many excuses, and how to beg. I evenutally end up being hired as a soccerball for my school districts soccer game because they are too poor to affort a ball, but guess what, after the game is over, they don't pay me, they throw me in a garbage bag and put me away, i don't even get food. after i sneak out, i go to dinner with some hairless cats, they survive because they have special abilities and adaptations, but im human and i have no adaptations, i cant even grow fur anymore. why! I need fur, its cold outside. wait a second, ok, i got side tracked, yes i need to eat from cans and find a juicy bug or two. they end up tasting like fried mouses. however i do prefer stealing from other homeless people, like you know their hair, as the particles on the hair gives me the nutrients i need to survive, and its very interesting, but please give me, im really bad at begging but you must give please, give me that hat i have always wanted, so people down the street wont be able to see my greasy hair so i can get a girl one day and repopulate my neigbourhood!

 

Watch it all the way through. Made me laugh my ass off the first time I saw it.

 

Contributing:











Take the time to read them. The Batman one is my favorite, makes me laugh every time.

 

Why can't John get his drivers license?

John is a rock.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9xH0xorgUoI

You wanted something funny.

I do not own this video, nor do i own the website.

 

first off if you dont pick my ill cry just like this guy =(

if the embedding doesn't work heres the link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ee925OTFBCA

And heres a true story.
when i was 11 i was playing with a friend of mine, we decided it would be a good idea to write a funny letter to the american embassy that was just down the road. (i was living in nicaragua at that time, Bit of a crap hole so i was bored)
so we proceed to right the letter that went like this

Dear embassy
if you do not bring us 1,000,000,000 dollars at the graveyard by midnight say bye bye to your embassy!
assholes

now we thought they would take it as a joke but they took in extremely seriously, as soon as we slid the letter under the gate, a white van pulled out of the embassy and 6 armed police men steeped out and with the weapons aimed at us (two 11 year olds) needless to say i was shitting bricks, they removed our shoe lasses and tied our hands with them and handcuffs, they then pushed us into the back of the van and took us to some police station.... after that it was just boring interviewing but yea i nearly shat myself =)

 

AND ALSO: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKlOMHMGZr4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CsIHavRW1l8&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyMXYE_50Ts&feature=related

LMFAO

​

 

it says it all

 

My wife and I took out life insurance policies on each other — so now it’s just a waiting game.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i__XhXf9rPI&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKlCIR654Ho
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlQSwY-YiH4

Try to watch these witouth laughing.

 

why did the chicken cross the road?
to win the fucking game.