Ruining it.

A few months ago I quit all drugs except for pot and the occasional acid hit. But here latley things have just been getting harder and harder, with losses in the family, losing friends, and having no one to really talk to. I just want to do a line of coke, or shoot up again, like I used to when things were better, you know? Like ruin my sobriety and just say fuck it all.
Last night, I finished a 32 ounce glass filled with vodka, then smoked 4 blunts of the most expensive shit I could get my hands on...it felt so right...idk what to do...can anyone give me any advice?

 

Don't.

For a start, if you drank 32 ounces (close to a litre) of vodka you're fairly lucky to be alive.

Secondly, hard drugs like heroin are only going to make your life worse. Pot will do you damage in the long run, but it is nothing compared to heroin, meth or whatever else.

Drugs are never ever going to solve your problems in the long term, if you don't think you have anything else to do try and find help.

 

Drugs won't solve the problems. It'd just postpone it and add more to your long list of problems. Talk to a guidance counselor.

Try to quit drinking and lessen your intake of drugs. Then try to quit taking the drugs altogether. If you have the cash, enrol yourself in a rehab program.

 

I went through a program before, and all it did was stress me out. Everyone there was just so judgemental, expecting perfection from an imperfect being. My problems just keep coming back no matter what I try, I feel deep down that I just keep wanting to take the easy way out and put no work into it. Maybe thats my problem? Maybe I just need to grow up and wake up. idk.

 

You said it yourself. It's the easy way out, it's never going to solve your problems, just hide them under the covers for a little while. And in the end, everything will be worse.

Try and involve yourself in more things. A job, sport whatever. Even if people are judgemental, just keep working at it until you're satisfied with yourself.

 

Who cares if they're judgemental? Just ignore them. You're not there to win a popularity contest.

Just keep redoing the program. If you get tired of it, throw your drugs away and do something healthy like going to the gym and what not.

 

Trust me, things only feel right when you're taking the drugs, but it's doing a lot of damage to you, apart from alcohol, but if you're taking that much alcohol, then I'd be concerned.

 

My brother was addicted to heroin for years. After many rehabs and visits to jail, he didn't stop until he moved out with me to California and started smoking weed everyday. I've known many other addicts who have OD'd and died from heroin and other drugs.

So I say keep on smoking all the bud you can until you feel no need for harder drugs. If you were heavily addicted, I know you can't just stop whenever you want. If you're having withdraws again, go see a doctor. There's medication for withdraws. Then after a few months, if you're addicted to weed, just start smoking less and less each day.

So really, whatever works for you if you're dedicated to stay clean.

 

If your losing friends and whatnot, find new friends that don't do any harder drugs or ones that will get you involved in drama which will cause stress. Drinking and smoking weed is nothing compared to shooting up or having some nose candy.

Also look at what's good in your life. When you think you lost everything, you didn't, you still have your life.

 

You need to make friends that aren't going to push you into things you don't want to do. I know how hard it is, but you have to recognize your problem. You have a very addictive personality and you need support from reliable friends. Try connecting with friends with different interests such as computer's, games, sports, etc...

 

Thanks for the advice everyone, On this day, of April 22nd 2010, at the hour of 7 est. I have signed up for program, that will help me, and put me through a Big brother Big sister program as well to help me help the community. I have a long road ahead of me, but you are right, its not worth it. I should have seen this my self....

 

Dude just tone down the pot and drinking and you will be fine the occasional blunt is ok

 

Good to hear it
Involving yourself in almost anything other than the drugs will help you go a long way.

 

Great to hear it mate.

Just keep going with it, you'll get there in the end.

 

Don't beat yourself up for not seeing it earlier Good luck and I hope you succeed in the program. Remember, don't give in to any sudden urges you may get.

 

Good luck in the program, and remember what you see when people do drugs (harder stuff). People lose jobs, houses, family, etc, over heroin and the such, so its not really worth it. Just play it low and stay out of that scene.

 

I have been in program for little over a week, throughout my time here I ahve made a friend who seemed to be in the same situation as myself, she is 19 like me and we are helping each other out quiet a bit. I probably never would have admited myself if it werent for necromancer, your words really hit me. Thank you, I feel as if I owe you my life.
Everyone else who posted, please please please don't take me wrong, your advice helped so much and I thank you.

 

Gosh being a slave to a drug (addicted) sometimes suck.
I had an H n Coke addiction and was forced to quit... honestly i cant take sobriety sometime... i dont get to see an addiction specialist for 3 months i guess to be put on methadone because my cravings are overpowering. Any money I get i know id spend getting high.

Sobriety aint easy once you've had the taste of such a high but if you are really committed dont give in! and if u get a craving talk to someone ANYONE
im here as well talk to me... im really good at listening

NA programs i believe blow, for me at least... make me more depressed than ever. Good luck man its a though road.

 

Thank you, I might take you up on your offer some day, as my father told me "life is gonna fuck you up. You either deal with it yourself and get destroyed in the process, or accept the helping hand that could pull you out of a very dark hole"
He put that in a card he sent me the second day here.

I would like to offer to you as well the same opportunity, please don't hesitate to pm me with any issues, it the least I can do.

 

I'll try hard to be sober but honestly i dont see myself sticking to it. And ty i will take you up on your offer as well.
I got too many problems to fit in 1 PM lol. Not really the talkative type more of a listener but if i get to know someone then maybe i open up.

:]

my dumb philosophy is "id rather live short in heaven than long in hell"