[Topical Battle] Ryan vs Unb4nn3d

Topic - Lost Love
Lines - 16 (8 Bars)
Due Date - N/A
Votes to win - 5

No dick riding voters
No voting till both people have posted
No hate votes

All votes must contain the following format:

Creativity:
Wordplay:
Originality:
Overall:

Goodluck ^.^

 

Edited.

 

For you was a rose, that blossomed in the sun,
And in remembrance, my heart has now been swollen.

The pain inside is fierce, just as my love once was,
And as I sit here for an answer, in return you say 'because'.

I don't see what went wrong, as I stood there for you,
In times of need, I was only one of the few.

My feelings were strong, and my emotions now crushed,
Even after it all, what I had done seems flushed.

There may come a day, where you'll need me again,
And if help arrives, I won't be one of the men.

You've ruined my life, and destroyed that around me,
But my love still lingers, and may consume me sadly.

My emotions are flaring, and I can stay with you no longer,
As I know I'll be hurt, just as my previous falter.

I want you in my arms, yet you're so far away,
But as I look around me now, I see a blossomed rose today.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yes, I was kind of in a rush, but this is the first time I've ever done such a thing.

Good luck to Ryan as well. Cast your Votes!

 

Creativity:Ryan 8 Unbanned 6
Wordplay: Ryan 7 Unbanned 3
Originality:Ryan 8 Unbanned 6
Overall: Ryan 22 Unbanned 15

Unbanned looked like he didn't know what he was doing. But it's his first time, it sorta sounded like a poem to me.

Anyway nice try Unbanned, But Ryan is still the Rap Battle King.

 

Creativity: Ryan: 9 Unb4nn3d: 7
Wordplay: Ryan: 8 Unb4nn3d: 8
Originality: Ryan: 10 Unb4nn3d: 7
Overall: Ryan: 27 Unb4nn3d: 22

A good try Unb4nn3d, but Ryan's lyrics sounded like they were straight off an Eminem album, and Eminem = Rap God :laugh:

EDIT: Ryan's reminded me a lot of his song "Crazy in Love". And I love that tune so...

 

Thanks for the votes guys. I must admit, Unb4nn3d did very well. Don't surprise me like that man ^.^

 

Creativity: Ryan 5, Unb4nn3d 2
Wordplay: Ryan 3, Unb4nn3d 2
Originality: Ryan 1, Unb4nn3d 1
Overall: Ryan 3, Unb4nned 2

"I had the,I never told her, For you was a rose.." Those are all uneeded fillers. Both of your raps were insnaely cliche and totally unoriginal

If you're going to write about love, write in an innovative way.

 

Ryan vs. Alex
Creativity: 5, 8
Wordplay: 3, 10
Originality: 1, 5
Overall: 9, 23

Owned Ryan. Hehe, just kidding.
[EDIT] Btw I thought both were complete (edit: awesomeness), but rated them nicely.

 

No, I think yours was better. There's a reason for your Title.

Current Status:

1. Ryan = 3 Vote(s)
2. Unb4nn3d = 1 Vote(s)

Please keep in mind that the first person to 5 Votes wins!

 

Ill give unb4nn3d a vote I liked his ryan I also liked yours. But my vote would go to unb4ann3d

 

Creativity: Ryan 7
Wordplay: Ryan 6
Originality: Ryan 8
Overall: Ryan 21

Creativity: Unb4nn3d 6
Wordplay: Unb4nn3d 7
Originality: Unb4nn3d 5
Overall: Unb4nn3d 18

Close but I think Ryan has it overall, only barely though.

 

Creativity: Ryan 8
Wordplay: Ryan 7
Originality: Ryan 6
Overall: Ryan 21

Creativity: Unb4nn3d 4
Wordplay: Unb4nn3d 3
Originality: Unb4nn3d 3
Overall: Unb4nn3d 10


Ryan won, although Unb4nn3d's did sound like a poem and flowed better.

 

Now, I haven't seen you for awhile, where have you been?

 

Creativity: Ryan 7, Unb4nn3d 8
Wordplay: Ryan 9, Unb4nn3d 7
Originality: Ryan 6, Unb4nn3d 8
Overall: Ryan 22, Unb4nned 23

 

Creativity: Ryan 8 unb4nn3d 7
Wordplay: Ryan 8 unb4nned 8
Originality: Ryan 7 unb4nned 9
Overall: Ryan 23 unb4nned 24

 

Well, looks like it's over.

Was 5 - 2(4) if you want to count the votes after it finished.

Unb4nn3d if you want to go again, different topic just let me know

 

Originality would be nice the next time around. There's potential but neither of you followed through for whatever reason.

 

If anyone has an idea for anew topic, let us know.