Giving away 5 accounts

To the point, 4 of the accounts have nothing but decent stats 1 of those for is a 3 letter name. the last account is a 4 letter low level. This is what you must do:
1. Make a joke, about anything, even me.
2. Check Thread everyday until June 27.
3 June 27 the funniest jokes in my opinion get the accounts.

GO!

David123-lvl 42, pen4nce
bizcuits21-lvl 39, crunk dance (goes wif his name)
Magma Force- lvl 19, 100k and lvl 76, Mr ruth3
l33er th4n l33t-3 letter, lvl 27 o7j

 

pointless thread! get a life please.

 

I give example: Go jump off a bridge, oh wait you you'd fall through first.

 

-Wanna Know why Santa's Sack is so big? because he only comes once a year xP.

-Wanna know why most women survived from the titanic accident? because shit floats.....my mom told me this one ?

-Doy can i have 2 accounts just for my Joy? i wanna have fun with my friend troy

If i get to win this can i have 3 letter name or maybe a pure? or a good stat/money main thanks alot.

 

This looks like fun... I'll give it a shot:

1. Heard a robber broke into your house last night, he gave you two choices... Suck his **** or die. Glad to see you still alive homes. - A friend texted this to me one day.

Not a person that tell jokes much... but, thats the best I got... Was fun though.

 

A man visits the doctor's because he has a severe stuttering problem.
After a thorough examination, the doctor consults with the patient.

Doctor: 'It appears that the reason for your stuttering is that your penis is about six inches too long and it is thus pulling on your vocal cords, and thereby causing you this annoying
problem of stuttering.

Patient: 'Ddddd octttor . Whhaaat cccan I dddo?'

The doctor scratches his forehead, thinks for a minute and states that there is a procedure where we can free up the strain on the vocal cords by
removing the six inches from the penis and freeing him from this horrible problem.

The patient stuttering badly states that this problem has caused him so much embarrassment as well as loss of employment that anything would be
worth it.

The doctor plans for the procedure. The operation is a success and six months later the patient comes in for his check up.

Patient: 'Doctor, the operation was a success. I have not stuttered since the operation. I have a great job and my self esteem is fantastic. However, there is one problem, my wife says that she sort of misses the great sex we used to have before the extra six inches were removed. So I was wondering if it is possible to reattach those six inches'.

The doctor scratches his forehead, thinks for a minute and says:
'I dddoonnnt ttthhhinkkkk thatttt wooould bbbbee possssssibbble'...

















A wealthy hospital benefactor was being shown around the hospital. During her tour she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating furiously.

"Oh my GOD!" screamed the woman. "That's disgraceful! Why is he doing that?"

The doctor who was leading the tour calmly explained, "I'm very sorry that you were exposed to that, but this man has a serious condition where his testicles rapidly fill with semen, and if he doesn't do that at least five times a day, he'll be in extreme pain and his testicles could easily rupture."

"Oh, well in that case, I guess it's okay," said the woman.

As they passed by the very next room, they saw a male patient laying in bed while a nurse performed oral sex on him.

Again, the woman screamed, "Oh my GOD! How can THAT be justified?"

Again the doctor spoke very calmly: "Same illness, better health plan."









Barbara Walters was doing a documentary on the customs of American
Indians.

While touring a reservation during the documentary she was puzzled as to
why the difference in the number of feathers in the headdresses.

So she asked a brave who only had one feather in his headdress, his reply
was: "Me only have one woman. One woman ... one feather."

Feeling the first fellow was only joking she asked another brave.

This brave had two feathers in his headdress and he replied:
Me have two women. Two women ... two feathers."

Still not convinced the feathers indicated the number of sexual
partners involved, she decided to interview the Chief.

Now the Chief had a headdress full of feathers. Which, needless to say
amused Ms.Walters. She asked the Chief, "Why do you have so many feathers
in your headdress?"

The Chief proudly pounded his chest and said: "Me Chief, me ~censored~'em
all. Big, small, fat and tall, me ~censored~'em all."

Horrified, Ms. Walters stated, "You ought to be hung."

The Chief said: "You damn right me hung. Big like buffalo, long like
snake."

Ms. Walters cried, "You don't have to be so hostile."

The Chief replied: "Hoss-style, dog-style, wolf-style, any style...me
~censored~'em all."

With tears in her eyes, Ms. Walters cried,"Oh dear."

The Chief said: "No deer. Ass too high, run too fast."

 

two gay guys, and two lesbians are on a trip to Hawaii, who gets there first?

the lesbians, because the gays are still packing their shit

 

your moma is so fat that when she walked in front of the tv i missed 3 comercials.

 

These are very good guys, keep it coming!

 

Yo' momma so fat even naruto couldnt "belive it".

 

they say the recipe for sprite is lemon and lime, but i tried to make it at home theres more to it than that!

i order the club sandwich all the time but im not even a member, idk how i get away with it.

i was gonna get my teeth whitened but i said fuck that, ill just get a tan instead.

when i was a boy i laid in my twin size bed and wondered where my brother was.

i like the Fedex driver because hes a drug dealer and he dont even know it.

my fake plants died because i did not pretend to water them.



if i win could i have the highest main please? ill be checking every day till the 5th.

 

Here is another one:

Two Bank robbers steal a bank successfully,one says to the other one:

How are we gonna scape now?

The other one answers:

Lets take that motorcycle right there.

The other one says:

But It has no tire!!

The other robber answers:

That's better like that,we leave no trail.

XP

 

your mum is your dad. i win.

 

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon?

8. 2 in the front, 2 in the back and 4 in the ashtray.


What do you call a barn full of black people? Antique farm equiptment.

 

lol so pointless

 

A scientific survey in 2002 attempted to find the funniest joke in the world. Thousands of people from dozens of countries voted on thousands of jokes. Each country had a different favorite. Overall, the number one and number two funniest jokes in the world, based on votes, are:
The funniest joke in the world:



A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.



The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”



The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”



There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: “Okay, now what?”



A lady walks into a laundromat and hands the man her shirt.
"I need this whitish stain removed"she said

The man behind the counter rolled his eyes and said "Again?"

"Oh don't worry, it's just old sticky milk this time"




Hillary Clinton says she's the most qualified because she was married to a president for eight years. Now let me ask you, if a brain surgeon quit his job, would everyone in the operating room say, "Wait, let's get his wife."

 

ima farma

 

a blind man walks into a bar with his seeing eye dog.
a couple seconds after he walks in.
he picks up the dogs leash and starts swinging it in circles.
so the bar tender says."wtf are you doing!!!!!!!!"
the blind man says, "taking a look around."

 

I got 4 to tell.

1. You're mama is so stupid she stole free bread
2. You're mama isso stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes
3. The girl and a boy are in class and the girl falls asleep and the teacher calls on her asking the question what is gods name? So the boy pokes her on the back with a pencil and she jerks up yelling Jesus Christ! The teacher says very good. The girl falls asleep again and the teacher calls her again this time asking What did Eve say to Adam after their 25th baby (something like that) So the boy pokes her again and she jerks up and says You poke me with that thing one more time and I will break it in half!
4. (This is a irl story) OK so me and my friend were ouside building a few cabinets and he had the screws and I asked for them and he said no so I took the drill and put it in front of his face and he says Im not afraid of that and I said ya your face is already screwed up.

 

Hmmm. Ill have a go at it:

Q: Why shouldn't gay guys be allowed in the army?

A: Cause they would be too much in love with the enemy to shoot them.



Q: Why do Adults play runescape?

A: Cause they got no life and their wife is having sex with someone else