How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

Discussion in 'Archives' started by Gerardcon, Jan 14, 2008.

How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)
  1. Unread #1 - Jan 14, 2008 at 2:08 AM
  2. Gerardcon
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    How Gerardcon Gets The Women

    I've done some research and these steps are the best way to get a girl to fall for you....trust me.....seriously your predicament couldn't get any worse if your seeking help on Sythe.org

    1. when she asks how she looks shrug and say "could be better" this will keep her on her toes. and girls love that.

    2. never hold her hand. this can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. (or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really really hard until she cries. this will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)

    3. once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. girls are like dogs. they love to be roughed up.

    4. call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. if she is say you better be , repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. this will show her you care.

    5. when she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. this will pave the way for her own personal improvement. and every girl needs some improvement.

    6. recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most. then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them. because jewelry is for pussies and asian ladies.

    7. if youre talking to another girl, make sure shes looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words "fuck you" and grab the other girls ass. Girls love competition.

    8. tell her you're taking her out to dinner. drive for miles so she thinks it's going to be really special. then take her to a burning tire yard. when she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really going to take her to dinner. then drive her home. when she starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper very quietly into her ear "...because i can."

    9. introduce her to your friends as "some chick". women love those special nicknames.

    10. play with her hair. play with it HARD.

    11. warm her up when shes cold...and not by giving her your jacket... then you might get cold. rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't stop bitching about the cold right now you're going to be bitching about a black eye." the best way to get warm is with fear.

    12. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the partys dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party.

    13. make her laugh. a good way to do this is if she has a small pet. kick the pet. i always find stuff like that funny. why shouldn't girls?

    14. let her fall asleep in your arms. when she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things. like masturbating.

    15. Spit often. I hear girls like guys that spit.

    16. if you care about her never ever tell her. this will only give her self confidence. then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be.

    17. Every time youre in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way shell go crazy.

    18. Take her out to dinner. Right when shes about to order interrupt and say no shes not hungry. make her watch you eat. Girls love a guy that speaks for her.

    19. look her in the eyes and smile. then clock her one. girls love a spontaneous guy.

    20. give her one of your t-shirts......and make sure it has your smell on it. but not a sexy cologne smell. a bad smell. you know what i'm talking about.

    21. When its raining keep asking her if shes crying. Shell say no its just the rain ten minutes later turn to her and just scream at her to "stop crying you fucking baby". Girls like a tough man as i've already stated.

    22. Titty twisters and plenty of them.

    23. if youre listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no. this way she'll think you're mysterious.

    24. remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material objects arent important. The only thing thats important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.

    25. when she gives you a present on your birthday, christmas, or just when ever, take it and tell her you love it. then next time you know she's coming over on a trash day leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. girls actually don't like this one that much but i think it's funny.

    26. If shes mad at you for not calling her when you say you will promise her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call youre going to tell her a special surprise. Now shell be really excited. Now dont call.

    Now if this doesn't work for you, theres something wrong. I've done all of these except for the titty twister one but that should work.
     
  3. Unread #2 - Jan 14, 2008 at 2:11 AM
  4. shakaka
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    Do Not Trade

    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    If you are serious, you will be alone. FOREVER.
     
  5. Unread #3 - Jan 14, 2008 at 2:15 AM
  6. 5w33t p00p3r
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    I lol'd big time
     
  7. Unread #4 - Jan 14, 2008 at 2:16 AM
  8. Raunch It K
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    im suprised your still alive.
     
  9. Unread #5 - Jan 14, 2008 at 2:17 AM
  10. Gerardcon
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    Notice I posted in the spam not general discussion section. Although I wouldn't suggest anyone do any of them, I have done them all.

    By the way have I told you I'm still a virgin? But I like to think that's my moral values and the fact that there isn't a lot of homosexuals where I live. jk =D

    And loving it.
     
  11. Unread #6 - Jan 14, 2008 at 3:27 AM
  12. chopper821
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    bhahahahahahahahha !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i lol'd alot
     
  13. Unread #7 - Jan 14, 2008 at 3:49 AM
  14. SimmaSix
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)



    Lol.


    (lengthens message)
     
  15. Unread #8 - Jan 14, 2008 at 6:42 AM
  16. Daily
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    Daily BANNED FROM MARKET
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    I'm pretty sure this might just be the funniest thing I've ever read on sythe.
     
  17. Unread #9 - Jan 14, 2008 at 10:20 AM
  18. K-3-V-1-N
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    gah, you know that i'm not a fan of you -.-, but that was funny as hell.
     
  19. Unread #10 - Jan 14, 2008 at 10:53 AM
  20. Tumma
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    Seems like you love cock 'eh? If not, get used to it cause you'll never be getting any girls.

    But that did give me a chuckle.
     
  21. Unread #11 - Jan 14, 2008 at 5:07 PM
  22. mega mix
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    lol wtf sure the ladie wernt your mum pretending rofl
     
  23. Unread #12 - Jan 14, 2008 at 5:15 PM
  24. islapfatties
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    dude i did this i have a court hearing in 3 days :(
     
  25. Unread #13 - Jan 14, 2008 at 5:19 PM
  26. Honeo
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    Haha, that was hilarious.
     
  27. Unread #14 - Jan 14, 2008 at 5:22 PM
  28. Phil
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    Nice one m8 haha :)
     
  29. Unread #15 - Jan 14, 2008 at 9:04 PM
  30. kotonaru
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    Liar :p but it would be funny if it were true. It would also show how much of a dipshit you are, but thats for a different time.

    Not quite my humor, and I think their should have been more mention of 6 year old girls taking their clothes off, to keep people reading.
     
  31. Unread #16 - Jan 14, 2008 at 9:23 PM
  32. janelily
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    i think you are telling a joke here. No girls would like you if you do all the things you said .

    well, u said u are just imagining ? kk. that's your ways
     
  33. Unread #17 - Jan 14, 2008 at 11:21 PM
  34. Gerardcon
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    Well there are some girls that are annoying as hell. And besides everyone knows I'm a prankster. Plus I moved from my hometown to Vegas so why the hell not?
     
  35. Unread #18 - Jan 15, 2008 at 7:45 AM
  36. Xieram
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    Ah, that changes everything! You know what they say, "whatever happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas" yeah something like that.

    your list made me laugh right there mate, good going.

    just ignore these other people here calling you names and things they don't know what there saying, this list was quite funny here lol
     
  37. Unread #19 - Jan 15, 2008 at 11:52 AM
  38. Mentis
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    After step 7 my girlfriend dumped me.. You UNBELIEVABLE ASSHOLE!
    HOW CAN YOU DO THIS?! YOU RUINED MY LIFE!!!!

    I WILL FIND OUT WOH U R AND I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU IRL!!11111!!111
     
  39. Unread #20 - Jan 15, 2008 at 1:37 PM
  40. b1b
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    How I Get The Ladies(And So Can You)

    Lol Wots A Wmoan!/1/1
     
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