Do's and Don't for an introvert

DON’T talk to me before I’ve had my coffee. Caffeine is an introvert’s best friend. I have just as much energy as the next guy, but talking requires a ton.

DO say hello. Just don’t say anything else. As much as I may love you, I wasn’t planning on seeing you on the street. If I had something to say to you besides hello, I would’ve scheduled a lunch or something.


DON’T talk to me if I don’t know you. Trust me, if you like awkward, empty conversations with strangers, we have nothing in common.


DO call me. I have some of my best conversations on the phone. I can spend hours on the phone talking about something I wouldn’t have spent one minute on in person. Phone conversations are premeditated, one on one, and in a controlled environment. And they’re easy to end.


DON’T make conversation in a line of any sort. Talking in lines should be illegal. There’s no clearer example of a situation where I set out to do something that did not include having a conversation. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to change my plans for lunch after seeing someone I know in line. I wish it were socially acceptable to wear a huge cardboard box while waiting in line. If you see me, pretend I am.


DO make conversation over a meal. Meals are another high point for introverts. Personally, I think it’s because both parties are seated. Talking is an activity for me, not something that goes on in the background. Eating tends to be automatic enough that I can give the conversation my full attention.


DON’T tell me I don’t go out enough. You don’t stay in enough. My room is my sanctuary. I’d love to spend time with you here. I have no interest in moving to a location with people I don’t know, where I’ll have to stand up, where I’ll have to yell to be heard, where no one has any interest in talking about anything anyone really cares about, and where it’s probably too warm.


DO talk to me about yourself. Whereas it completely drains me to make small talk, big talk is energizing and fun. It doesn’t have to be philosophical or important, just interesting and personal. I could write a whole guide on this one tip. Here’s a short summary: don’t talk to me about the weather, friends in common, the news, our professors, or our homework assignments. Do tell me stories about yourself, tell me what you did today, tell me what annoys you, tell me what you’ve been thinking about. Introverts are great listeners if what we’re listening to has substance. If I’m talking to you, I want to know you and I want you to know me.


DON’T call me “serious.” For some reason, it’s taboo to say anything thoughtful in a group setting. I can’t tell you how many times someone has responded to me with something like “Wow Danny, you’ve really thought that through,” and then chuckled, as if I were some sort of novelty. Of course I’ve thought it through, or I wouldn’t have said it.
DO embrace silence. If there’s nothing worth talking about, everyone’s time is better spent thinking. Most silences aren’t awkward, unless you’re just an awkward person.


DON’T think that I like being alone. I need to be alone after being in a group for a while, to recharge. But I love being around people most of the time, even if we’re not engaging in anything. There’s a great line from Waiting for Godot: “Don’t talk to me. Don’t speak to me. Stay with me.”

Discuss, etc.

 

intresting..

 

Now I know how to react to you in the IRC

 

Are you an introvert? If so, how will I get to know you! You don't like talking to strangers.

Nonetheless, have a good vacation.

 

wayyyy too serious man! hahahaha

Nah but check it out, the ironic thing about being introverted is you can't expect other people to know your introverted just by looking at you, much less for them to really understand the ramifications of that, so you gotta give those of our species who are a little more active in the social domain a little bit of a break man, it's just diversity

Or you could turn this into a t-shirt to really get the message across.

Peace

Love

 

wats ur numba/?!1

 

I can very much relate to this. Seriously, (ha) why is it that thoughtful and/or meaningful conversations are scoffed at in a group setting?

 

looks like someone shared a lot of their hates/likes with the people of sythe hehe.

 

Btw, space serious and silence.

Well, idk if anyone here knows you irl, but some of this was written for your sake I assume. lol.

 

Interesting thread lol. You become more stranger thesedays, but more intellectual as well.

 

That was bullshit.

 

Intp Ftw

 

You are bullshit.

I'm an introvert as well. I love to spend time by myself, and with others.

 

Im an introvert for sure, im shy, especailly when it comes to girls, unless I know them... and I only turn a wee bit extravert when I'm drunk (like now)

(PS Im not turning into a complete asshole when Im drunk, I know myself)

EDIT: I know im an introvert, and I finally read ur thread entirely (dun get me wrong)

Look, I dun like being alone, but I don't like talking to people I never met before, it's always an awkard moment. You talk about certain things you never talk about. When I like people, after talking alot, I always ask how I can contact them, to be fair, not always, but I ask their phone number, their msn, or when im not interested, I just say goodbye.

Being an introvert is very interesting, because you always think what will happen after you spoke to that person. For example, when I was in costa rica in a small hotel I spoke to an american person, and we had interesting convertsasions, about america, and about holland, about the place he lived and where I lived, we never met, he wasnt even in age "group" I was, he had a wife (maybe even chilren, I dnno, I dun remember).... but we had interesting coversations. Normally I would never ever make these conversations, because I am a shy person, I dont act like one. Dunt know why, I am always myself, thats 1 thing. but I dont wanna come over like a shy person. I wanna be like everybody else, but that 'shyness'(?) takes that away from me.

PS I am sorry if I cant remember this the next day but I am sure it;s the truth because I always try to tell the truth but I never wanna come over to be a "bad person" (which I am not).

 

Well boo fucking hoo.

 

I don't want to sound stupid but what's an introvert?

 

Alright, you might find it strange that I quote myself, but what I just said there, I can't remember typing that line. I don't have a feeling I want to be like everybody else, never had that. I am myself, I act like myself.
I just am a "normal" person, and I don't have the feeling that that shyness takes things away from me. I'm shy, but not that shy that is makes me want to be like everybody else, and it keeps me away from doing stuff. Just wanted to make that clear.

 

I have a friend. His name is Trin. You would like Trin.

 

Someone who is shy.

 

What the - I posted this over 8 months ago. >_>