Enough is enough? But I can't do anything about it.

Hi.

I'm going to be straight and forward with this.. I'm 19 years old - Sebastian - studying at the university. I've been with a lot of girls just not these 2. I don't know why. I have a crush on her.

I've talked and had fun with alot of girls (So I can actually talk. I'm not shy) - but when these she's around I instantly can't talk. Can't chat, and can't do anything.

With others girls, say girl c. I can spend all of my day with Girl c and have fun - go out - eat - dinner - cinema - joke around - dirty joking.. And so on. But when Girl b is around. I can't do anything.

It's not even possible to talk with her. I'm studying a completely different major (Eng.) and she's business (BIT). So it's not possible to talk with her in the lectures. And while on breaks, I can. But I can't at the same time. I'm shy around them.

And here, I've talked with even hotter girls (Girl c) which I already talk with and have fun. And I'm not even shy around her. We can talk dirty jokes and still laugh.. And everything.


Any help is appreciated - even from boys. But I'd like to know the answers from girls too.. I already asked my girl friends (NOT GF).

Can community girls actually help?

And even if I actually talked with one of my crushes, I don't have anything to talk about but when I'm with C I can talk shittons.



Tldr; CRUSH. And I can't talk to her because I'm shy around them - but not shy with other girls.

 

@Sonia @Yankiee community girls pls

 

but how do you have two crushes? what does crush mean to you?

 

They're so attractive and I do like them - maybe like love her? I don't know. But I for sure. DEFO. Feel something when both of them are around. I usually just forget about who's with me when both of them are around. Or one of them. And just focus at them.

 

no idea what you are even asking

 

Fixed the thread even more.

I'm shy around her but not with other girls. Need some help with this. I need to get this bad habit out of me.

 

Think about this first:

Even if you're not shy in general, has girl C made it really easy for you to talk to?

If girl B isn't as open and it feels like you need to lead the conversation, you may be hesitant as you're used to girls like "c" drawing you in.

Avoid reading any pickup stuff online, as it can cause overthinking in the smallest of situations with little importance. Some of it is valid, but reading between the lines it's just personal development and common sense.

I assume at the moment you're infatuated with girl B for some reason, maybe just naturally and you don't know why yourself yet.

 

Ye - I'm kinda infatuated - is this normal? Like I can't talk with her while I can talk with others normally?

And how can I possibly fix this bad habit (After all; she's just a girl like any others, but for some reason.. I can't treat her like the other girls.) - And about the pickups I don't really use any of teh pickup lines.

 

Just remember to not overthink. She isn't a mind reader and won't necessarily know you have a crush on her just because you've opened a conversation with her.

Yeah it's very normal, and I'll give you 2 real examples.

My real life friend is very smooth with girls, he's slept with 4 different girls in one week while on a break. He's just one of 'those guys' who can 'do it' with girls. Even he had the same with some girls, and I've witnessed it myself in social events.

For my own example. I only started doing well with girls under a year ago, I used to have what you're feeling with almost EVERY girl I spoke to. I've changed a lot as a person though in the past year or so, but now that I'm super relaxed with girls I don't overthink much. It does happen occasionally though with some girls.

In my opinion it's because that slight cocky-ego-thing we have in side us that thinks we can read people better than we actually can, and when a girl comes accross that challenges this, it causes us to pause and overthink, and ultimately just become unnecessarily anxious due to curiosity and infatuation.

I want to stress though that this is random thoughts that come to mind when trying to understand your situation, and there is no right or wrong formula to girls

 

Could this possibly be because of the fact that girls have approached you first? A lot of men feel comfortable with certain girls because they approach them first however that is not always the right way to go about it. Do you know any of Girl B's friends. If so try to get introduced to her via her friends. You will most likely feel more comfortable that way since she would not want to be embarrassed around them.

I do find it kind of awkward how a guy who tips webcam models and posts nudes in the discord is struggling to talk to girls. This is actually a rare occurrence.

 

Exactly. I'm only shy around her. But not with others. I literally freeze, and can't do anything.

And ye- I think I know some of her friends. But isn't this an awkward way?

 

Not necessarily. You are most likely going to hang around with her friends anyway since girls don't really like being with one other person on a daily basis. Its not the fact of you going to up and speaking to her thats the issue. It's the fear of rejection.