Is it worth being friends?

...

 

It just sounds like you were friends and then started dating and it didn't work out, i suggest being her friend because if you truly lover her like you claim I'd rather her be in my life some than not at all, it's truly hard to overcome that and let the love of your life be with someone else, it's painful, but you need to endure it, it's part of life. Sorry this is happening to you bud.

 

I'm just going to put this out there even though I don't know the exact circumstances: sometimes your boundaries are more mental rather than physical. But if you're truly certain it won't work then alright.

I'm practically best friends with one of my exes. We were together for nearly 2 years and we thought we were going to get married and be high school sweet hearts. While it wasn't the easiest path, it worked out in the end. We still care immensely about eachother, but more so like sister and brother rather than in a relationship context. It took a bit of talking and figuring things out but we were able to make it work. I'd have to say: the worst regret you can have is wishing you at least tried to make it work. Do your best, and if it becomes evident that it is an all or nothing situation, you then have your ultimatum.

 

Hmm, this is a rather unique situation. I can definitely see your view of the problem and hers too, I know exactly what you mean by that. The thing is you're good friends I assume and since you can't be together what will happen when you start dating another girl, she could go completly nuts but then again burning bridges and cutting off the relationship isn't a very good option either, because you've shared so many good memories and spent time with each other. Why are you not able to date, what is stopping you may I ask? You really have to dig deep down for this and figure out on your own if you want to lose a friend, just remember once it's gone it is gone and will never ever be the same even if you manage to "fix" it. My mom always told me when I was younger, " Appreciate what you have before it becomes what you had " I'm sure you get my message. If you ever need to talk just hit me up.

 

Exactly, you have a special relationship with her that you might never find somewhere else, now changing your life style completly, I now see why it is so difficult, I personally hope things will work out eventually for you two, things might look a bit different in a couple of years, I wish I could help you here but I can't, I would never advise someone to burn the bridges between a person, but in the end it is your life, you have your own goals, choose wisely.

 

Yeah I understand you quite well as I found myself in a very similar situation as yours a while ago, You might be angry, but try to let it go and not focus on it, it will definitely pass, how about keeping her in your life, yet keeping your life balanced so you can focus on work and other priorities? It's a win win for both of you in my book

 

I could see this being healthy if you can hold yourself back and not let jealousy get in the way. The way I see this going is possibly you trying to maintain a friendship and that grows to a friends with benefits in which that could end terribly or great. She could possibly find some guy that in which you get jealous and that ruins your friendship. And finally, you two eventually just maintain great friends and you are able to resist the lust and temptation of trying to date her or be possessive. It's a natural thing and nothing you or her can control. Just remember she will struggle just as much as you will.

 

Friends come and go but what you do for your future will define you for the rest of your life. You obviously have a certain outcome in life that you are looking to achieve. She could have been Apart of your plan but she made a decision that clashes with your desired future. You might not find another like her but who is to say you can't find someone even better? I would recommend you forget about her and look towards your bright future. It might hurt now but I believe you will be better off in the long run. What ever you decide, I wish you the best.

 

I honestly think you should just cut her out of your life. I've been in that kind of situation before and it's not healthy. ESPECIALLY if you're still ''in-love'' with her. You said it yourself, you want to be in a relationship with her, don't settle to be a emotional sponge for all her problems. You will be hurt if you stay friends with her man, at least that's what I can tell you based on experience.

 

Be friends with her. If the reason you two didn't work out was circumstantial then you should still be her friend. Who knows, maybe in the future circumstances will change and you two may be together. But don't abandon her just because you two are no longer together, you share mutual love and should cherish that. Not all exes are on good terms, so to be at a place where both of you still love each other and want the best for each other is a good thing, and it'll be weird for you at first but you'll get used to it and later on in life you'll not regret having continued on as good friends. If you don't at least give it a shot you will come to regret it later on in life, I guarantee it. If you try the friendship deal and it doesn't work out or it's toxic and only hurts you both, then drop all contact and move on but give it a shot before you leave completely.

 

Then you have to think to yourself. If you truly think she is the one for you, do you think it is worth the sacrifice? If you dedicate yourself to her, I'm sure she will allow you in. I'm not saying you should I'm just saying you should re-evaluate on where you stand with her.

 

Something like that happened with my girlfriend, and now we're dating and we've been together for 10 months.