Deacon's Exquisite Writing

... it was a quick write too... After a week nearly of researching... wrote it in an hour..


Thanks 00_Own_00.... good luck on getting the A.... when you get your grade back.. lemme know

 

Do you write stories relating to sexual fetishes and or scat swapping?

 

.. I'm always looking to expand my talents and capabilities.... what kinda work are you looking for? I can't garuntee great quality...

 

Genius, i might need one soon.

 

You actually write suicide notes? That's awful.

And once you go higher in the words your prices get worse. Isn't it supposed to be opposite like the more words you write, the better the deal?..

 

No, because I'm not making "Deals" I'm making a product.


If you go to McDonalds and order 50 Double cheese burgers it's gonna cost yah 50 bucks.. If you order 1 its 1 buck..... Proportion = Price.


And suicide notes are for joking only. All the ones I write are for playing pranks on others, or simply posting somewhere random and seeing what people say. They're really cool.

 

Suicide notes as a joke, thats really not funny...

 

No it's just you have no humor .

 

laughing at someones unhappiness because they think someone they care about has killed themselves, that's fucked up.

 

It's not a suicide note that they're going to use... Here's an example of one:

Listen Up Dumbfucks:




Most people kill themselves because of a mental condition. This is true in my case too. The condition I suffer from is that I am not normal, I am not like everyone of you "sane" people.

I am not normal in the sense that I am not like every other one of you brain-dead zombies. I can think. I can reason intelligently. I can observe and learn from life. I can make my own decisions and follow through on them. And I can do these without any aid from celebrities, T.V. or radio. Unfortunately, every one of you shit-brained lemmings seem to lack these skills and I can't fucking take it any more.

Since everyone else in this world is a fucking retarded drone who revels in their ignorance and unintelligence, I must put an end to my misery. I truly wish I was normal. I wish I could be a fucking retarded sponge like all of you. I wish I could have the same conversations day in and day out about sports, politics and "how about that weather huh?". But I can't.

Sure you'll see this note and say chrystyan's the crazy one. You have to it's the only way you can go on thinking you're sane and your pathetic life is meaningful. Go ahead, call me the weirdo like everyone else surely will. Then return to your happiness of everyday mindless monotony.

My only wish is that the bullet I put into my brain doesn't kill me but only leaves me brain dead. For if ignorance is bliss and everyone of you fuck-for-brains is truly happy, then living a life without a brain stem in a coma, devoid of any cognitive ability must surely be utopia.




Leave My Machine Plugged In You Fucking Retards,


chrystyan



P.S. I superglued all my orifices shut so you coroner pricks can't steal my fillings or sex up my corpse.




That's one I wrote forever ago.. then my friend who I was working on them with made a website.. I can't remember where it was.. but we don't talk anymore .

 

And as for your exquisite writing, you just used about 20 too many full stops in your example above.

 

You don't even understand writing .

A person who writes a suicide note does not have perfect grammar.. They are about to kill themselves. DER. lol

Badger, stop trying to argue me, you're always going to be wrong so it's pointless.

 

Why dident i see this before i got kicked outta school? haha i think what you're doing here is great

 

So wait because you say I am wrong, it means I am wrong. I am sorry I dont understand that and the points I argued made a fair bit of sense seeing as you did say you wrote suicide notes to play practical jokes on other people.

Anyhow continue to try and sell your writing services, they suck in my opinion.

 

Thanks Badger


lol waff3n, I dropped out too >.<.. my teachers couldn't take my greatness.

 

I like your work. That abortion speech was amazing.

 

I may need you.

 

Man, your writing looks great. Too bad I finished my essay yesterday. I definitley will use you next time I need one written.

 

i wish i had a 100 page essay and i would make u write it for me =)

 

works for me