lol at u betas

I'm an alpha male. And girls want to **** alpha males. Let it piss you off as much as you want, but you know it's completely true. That girl you like who is kinda cute in a weird way, but is totally sweet and you have the biggest crush on? The one who keeps going back to guys who treat her wrong for reasons you don't understand? The one who calls you up at 1 am to cry about how her boyfriend hasn't called her in 3 days, and no matter how long you listen to her, she'll never think of you as anything other than asexual? The one who will curl up next to you on the couch, hug you close, kiss you on the cheek, and never let you ****ing touch her beyond that?

Yeah, I'm ****ing her.

The hot girl who won't even look at you when you nod at them and smile? The one who laughs when you trip in the hallway and drop your stuff? The one who comes up and coyly asks for your help with her homework, and then pretends you don't exist once you finish?

Yeah, I'm ****ing her too, even harder.

The geeky girl you think might be enough like you that you have a chance with her? She plays warcraft on your server, and watches anime, and reads comics? She's so incredible and you just love her so much but you still haven't worked up the courage to tell her how you feel about her?

Guess who just sucked me off and told me they'll always love me?

And what's more? I laugh at guys like you. When you cry about how much girls treat you bad, and wonder why they can't just see that you're a nice guy who would always treat them right? I nod and tell you to hang in there, you'll find someone right for you someday, don't give up hope man. But inside? I'm laughing my ass off at you you pathetic ****. Every girl you set your sights on, who isn't a disgusting pig-monster, I'm going to **** 6 ways from sunday before you even tell her you think she's cute. I won't bother trying when you finally settle for that 350 pound girl who works at hardees, you can have that. Anything else I'm going to cum on her face before you get those lips near it.

And the biggest reason I laugh? It's not me doing all this. It's the girls. When you cry about how lonely you are? Or talk about how you just want to curl up and dissapear, and all that emo bull****? You're triggering her "Don't ****" instinct something fierce. You're a miserable weak coward, why would she want your genes? Feel free to buy her a new computer and help her decorate her apartment, you're great for that. But her baby-maker is barking orders at her, telling her to wrap her legs around me and hold on for as long as she can. She needs it, on a primal level you'll never get to see first hand, even if you do get a chance to **** her. Sooner or later one of them will lay back and spread their legs, but you won't see any hunger in their eyes. They won't beg you to love them forever and make them yours. You won't know what it's like to see her animal side needing you as much as she needs to eat and breath.

And she's cheating on you, I promise that. When she sits around quiet and uncomfortable, acting irritable and irrational towards you, wanting you to just back away and leave her alone, it's not her period. It's because I haven't called her for a day or two and her instincts are telling her to go find me. The primitive section of her brain doesn't want to risk smelling like another man when she gives herself to me, she wants me to know she's completely mine. We do things together she tells you she never would. Her pooper? Mine. I want to give her a facial? of course. I want her to suck the cum out of my dick, even though I just finished pumping away at her ass? she's never going to tell me no. She doesn't WNAT to tell me no. She wants me to know she'll do anything it takes to keep me. She'll rim my ass while she's down there sucking me off if it means pleasing me. She'll drink my cum from a shotglass. She'll wear a buttplug when we go out to dinner. She'll sleep handcuffed to my headboard. Anything.

And then she'll go home to you and tell you she's not in the mood today.

I'd say you should become an hero, but you being around makes her want a real man all the more, so keep ***ging it up emo bitches, I'll keep that pussy warm while you're crying in the corner.

 

I have no idea why I haven't been banned yet.

 

Hey Faggots,
My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it’s fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.
Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than “jack off to naked drawn Japanese people”? I also get straight A’s, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It’s me and my bitch

 

^ mynigga.jpg

 

boring copy pasta of peace

 

cook us up some fresh pasta pls

 

negged

 

I hacked like 3 different admins 3-4 years back. I even got into TerranKiller's account for a while. Why am I not banned yet?

 

What on irk did you just say about me, you weak little hyooman? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Irken Elite training, and I’ve been involved in operation impending doom 1, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained on hobo 13, and I’m the top Invader in the entire Irken armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe your sad little brain out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this FFFIILTHY rock, mark my words. You think you can get away with saying those pathetic comebacks to me over the Internet? Think again, hyooman scum. As we speak I am using my special advanced SIR units across the planet and your house location is being traced right now so you better prepare for the DOOM, maggot. The DOOM that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You are dead, weak one. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can destroy you in an infinity of ways, and that’s just with my iron fist. Not only am I extensively trained in hobo 13 combat, but I have access to the entire weapon sending and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the planet, you little stink. If only you could have known what stupid retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your noise tube. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you idiotic worm. I will rain doom all over your filthy doomed head and you will drown in it. You are history now, little hyooman.

 

I can hack your account if you want

 

Ok. "Hack" me. I don't think you know what that means, but go for it!

 

You sir, you are a prick making fun of everyone else before knowing anything about anybodies lives.

 

does literally every post you make have to be misc orientated?

 

retards

 

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

 

real funny nano ayy lmao m8

 

Bump!

 

loooooooool did bodgan really say that things?

 

Alpha male crew checking in