Relationship Troubles

Hey, so I've been having a lot of relationship troubles the past couple weeks. Here's the basic situation:

About 2 weeks ago my girlfriend of 1 year and almost 10 months, keep in mind I'm 17, told me that she wasn't happy and wanted a break from our relationship. 3 months prior to that I had broken up with her because I thought the same, but after a week I decided that breaking up with her was a mistake, and that I wanted to get back together. We did, and continued on for another 3 months, until this happened:

About a month ago, a couple weeks prior to her asking for a break, she began talking to a guy more and more frequently. Snapchatting, texting, etc., all the time. Even when I was with her and I'd try to talk to her, she'd say 'hold on' and then ignore me for a couple minutes to finish talking to him, say a sentence or two, and then go back to talking to him. About a week before she asked for a break, she began talking to yet another guy in a similar fashion. Then on a friday night when we were out on a date, she told me she felt "lost" about 20 minutes into the date (we were at a skating rink) and that she wanted to be alone. She quickly found the first guy she began talking to, and spent over an hour and a half collectively talking to him that night, all while laughing and having a good time. I, naturally, was furious. The next day she then told me she wanted a break, and that she wasn't sure she could be happy with us going forward.

A week later, she decided that she wanted to get back together with me, but not right yet. I asked her about the guys she had been talking to, and she said she kissed them, but only as friends. She also said she wasn't remotely interested in a relationship, sex, or anything with any of them. I agreed that I wanted the same.

Flash forward to now. She said that she isn't sure if she wants to get back together anymore. She does want to become FWb, Friends With Benefits, and that her parents are leaving this weekend. But she said if I don't want to, that one of those guys that she was seeing will take my place instead. AFTER she told me that she wasn't remotely interested in anything with any of them. I also have a girl that I'm getting to know better, and she is really attracted to me, and really likes me.

Here is how I feel: I feel kind of deceived by my ex girlfriend, and I feel like she's trying to play me or lead me in circles. I've known her for so long and have a natural trust in her that is diminishing by the day, but she has never played games before, and I'm hesitant to think she is now, but I don't know. I'm like 80% sure I want to move on, and feel like I won't be doing that agreeing to FWB, I'm also extremely mad about this whole situation.

I want to hear some outside opinions if anyone has any about this situation.

 

She's playing games. If she straight up said to you "If you don't want to, I have these guys who are interested" then just drop her bro. Obviously things aren't working out with you two and it looks like you've already had multiple opportunities to figure that out (First break, second break, now this).

Start talking to the other girl.

 

I have been, and basically the other girl wants a relationship, but she said she wants to be friends right now because she doesn't want to feel like the other girl, which is understandable. I've been talking to her more and more, and I don't like her as much as she likes me, but I see potential.

And my ex isn't saying that persay, but she's taunting me with it. She's sent a snapchat of a corset, claiming I could see it on if I said yes, etc. Normally I might be more inclined to say yes, but I don't want to give the other girl the wrong impression should I choose to pursue that avenue.

 

If you aren't dating the other girl yet, don't tell her. Go and fuck your ex one more time, and just absolutely pound it and make it a memorable night for her, but leave there immediately after having sex and don't go back out with her. Only fuck her that one time, then just let her keep texting you begging you for more and play the game back with her. If you do that, I guarantee that'll get her good lol. But still talk to the other girl and see if it can be something more than friends. Don't go back with your ex.

 

I'm not looking to play games back. Right now I'm furious and just want to cut all ties, but I'm not sure how I'll feel 2 days from now. And in my school, word spreads. When I got together with my ex, she was a bashful virgin who would never talk about sex. Now shes open about everything, telling people all about her sexual experiences, even people she doesn't know. She'd surely blab and it'd get to this girl, and give her the wrong impression that I'm just looking for a fling or to get the most sex I can

 

Ah, yeah, forgot that you were still in school and that the girl you like now goes to school with you guys. Eh, honestly man. Don't fuck her. If you do feel different in two days and you get feelings again, then maybe act on them. If she truly wants you and doesn't want to fuck the other guys, then she'll wait for you, ifnot, then she'll fuck the other guys and get over you. Otherwise, just cut her off and don't even reply to her anymore.

She gets the impression that you're still into her because you're replying to her texts and snapchats. The best thing you can do, don't reply to her texts, open her snapchats but don't reply to them. She'll wonder what's wrong and she'll be so interested and confused that she'll chase you, women like what they can't have, the same goes for men. Let her chase you, if things don't work out between you and this other chick, then maybe go back with your ex.

 

unfortunatley at that age people change alot and both your mind and body mature alot man. It sucks but it seems that you two have just drifted too far as a couple and there isnt alot that can be done. (even if you do manage to salvage the relationship, it wont be as full as it could have been)

im not saying just tell her to get fucked and walk away but tell her how it is.
1. you dont want to just be a backup plan who she can go to after these guys fuck her over.
2. you dont want to be half/half. You're either together or seperated.

IMO, sounds like you're just as confused as she is man. I know it'll be hard to let go of memories of people but sometimes people change and the person you remember having a good time with is not the same person you walk away from.

 

The reason I'm hesitant on that is because she's casually saying she has another guy to fall back on if I decide otherwise. She is so casual about sex now, and I'm not. I view it as more than that, and I'm not the type of guy to hook up, as she's claiming she'll do with this other guy.

And she's not the type to chase. She's more assertive and audacious than me, but if I were to ignore her, she'd quickly get the message and just not bother anymore and move on with her life.

I honestly feel like she may have been lying and having sex or whatever else behind my back.

 

.... Did you read what you just wrote? If she can easily "get the message" and move on with her life quickly, then why would you want to get back with her? You clearly don't mean that much to her so you might as well move on brother.

 

I know. And it's frustrating, because I feel like I've done a lot for her and I'm still somewhat emotionally attached to her.

 

Trust me, I broke up with my ex a month and a week ago, and I still think about her every day and shit, but you just gotta move on or you're just gonna hurt yourself in the end and possibly get lazy and depressed and have no motivation to do anything anymore.

 

I've already hit the depressed phase. It really hit me hard the first week, but I've improved a bit since then, but not a lot. I just don't know where to go. I'm hoping a couple days will bring some more clarity, because I feel I'm nearing a point where I need to make a decision.

 

Rebound sex or relationships usually work well. I'd prefer the sex over the relationships because rebound relationships fail 95% of the time. But you say you like another girl and you want to possibly date her, I'm not sure if the relationship will work since it'd be a rebound one but it's worth a shot, either way it'll get you over your ex.

 

That'd pretty much be the goal. And I know they usually don't. I'd be looking to just date someone fun for a few months, nothing too serious.

 

no, it wouldn't "be the goal" make it your goal now. Drop that bitch so you can move on =p

 

As I'm side, I'm only 80% sure that's what I want to do ATM, so.

 

Get rid of her.

 

This situation really depends on what kind of person you are. If you feel the need to have a deep meaningful relationship its time to let her go.. But if you think you can do this friends with benefit thing until you get with this new girl that could be fun. After you do get with this new girl though you should probably quit any interaction with the now EX girlfriend.

 

I'm pretty sure I'm going to break up with her. Tried to talk to her today, but she just got flustered and mad at me, which further infuriated me...

 

Sounds like she's 17! Good choice you can't really be pushed around in this kind of situation, you really just gotta stick to what you believe in so that the message is received loud and clear.