Corrupt a wish

After the recent thread telling us we will get three wishes and post them. I thought it would be fun to bring back the Corrupt A Wish game. The original idea was found on another site however I thought it would be fun to bring it over to Sythe.

Rules:

1) User posts a wish
2) Another poster corrupts #1 wish and posts their own wish
3) A different poster then corrupts #2 wish, and post their own wish.
4) Once a poster corrupts a wish, they must think of a new way to corrupt it. This is to prevent every response from being and then you die. You can get creative with it
5) All Sythe rules apply.

Wish: I wish I get a Tesla Model S as a graduation gift

 

The above poster gets his Tesla Model S, a scaled build it yourself version, that is.

I wish I had an infinite sum of money.

 

The money is a disused, worthless currency as one was not specified.

I wish I could teleport.

 

The teleport goes straight into the depths of the Bermuda Triangle only.

I wish I was perfect

 

But seeing as perfection is different to everyone, this would be impossible. Some rich men consider women who are morbidly obese perfection whilst others prefer 100 lb women as perfection.

I wish to live a healthy, long life.

 

You are granted your wish and live on an isolated island all by yourself with no internet connection.

I wish that I could have xray vision

 

Granted but you look down and the radiation from your x-ray vision disintegrates your penis.

I wish I could fly.

 

But flying 100 metres requires the energy of running a mile.

I wish I had super-human strength

 

You're on a planet with no gravity.

I wish I was in space.

 

But you're stranded in space, seeing absolutely nothing beautiful.

I wish I had an extra testicle.

 

Wish granted, you are in the space between my asscheeks.

 

Your extra testicle is dangling from your chin.

I wish I had a pool of 100 dollar bills.

 

The pool is on fire, you watch it burn.

I wish I could sleep forever.

 

Granted. You have a pool with one hundred $1 bills. The water has soaked the money to the point where the bills will fall apart if picked up.

I wish I could turn invisible.

 

You can not speak ever again since you can not be seen.

I wish I had super strength

 

Your muscles are so big you can no longer fully extend your arms to reach your face and everything you touch gets crushed.

I wish I had a plain cup of water.

 

The cup shatters from the boiling hot water and blisters/cuts your mouth open.

I wish I had 9 lives

 

In order to give you 9 lives you needed 9 hearts making you very deformed and you have incredibly high blood pressure.

I wished it rained 100 dollar bills.

 

Your 9th life you're reborn as a pimple on the ass of Miley Cyrus.


Still wish I was in space.

 

It's acid rain and you melt within 45 seconds.

Still wish I was in space.