Rape

Or the fact that she's too scared to tell her friends? Yeah she's told her mum, I convinced her to do that.
She's told me & her mum, that's it. No alcohol involved at all for anyone that's automatically presumed that.

 

I mean, why was she all alone with the friend of the friend?

 

He asked if she could speak with him, so clearly she thought nothing of it, that's when it all happened..

 

She has not contacted the police? Your girlfriend needs to realize that a friend 'raping' someone else is absolutely unacceptable in society and he needs to face the consequences.

 

She's contacted the police yes, she's sgreed to press charges so the investigation is going on now.

 

If she actually was raped, I wouldn't frown upon you for beating the guy to a pulp. I've got a feeling if she won't tell you the persons name that there might be more to it than you think.

 

This. Regardless I would beat the guy to a pulp but if she won't tell you the name, she won't go to the police, she wasn't going to tell her mom, then there's more to this story then she's telling you.

 

Yeah if she doesn't tell you the name and who it is then it's a bit suspicious. You're saying she has reported to the police which is good otherwise something defo would have been up.

 

I don't think any of you actual realise how scary it is for her. She's blaming herself so much, she's ridiculously scared at everything right now.

 

To be honest mate, fuck everything that almost everyone on this thread has stated.

First of all, it is NEVER someones fault for getting raped, regardless of drinking or drug use. When you take a drug or drink you are no longer able to consent to sexual intercourse. You say no alcohol was involved, if that is what your girlfriend has said, trust her on that. Even if she did sleep with someone who had coerced her while she was impaired by alcohol (which I doubt), then it is still rape, she wouldn't be "crying wolf."

Secondly, it is good that she went to the police. The judicial system in this country is fairly well thought out. If the man is caught, which I can almost assure you that he will, then he will face jail time. It may mean that your girlfriend must take the stand however. It is imperative that when this time comes, you support her even more than you already have. Her not telling you the name of the man is probably in the best interest of everyone. What will happen if she tells you the name of the man? You will probably go and beat the snot out of him. Good job, now he reports you. You are both arrested. He threatens to press charges for assault and battery (with a deadly weapon if you had a knife on your possession) unless your girlfriend drops her charge. So what ends up happening is your girlfriend will drop the charge because she doesn't want you to go to jail. When all is said and done, he walks away with a black eye and a broken nose instead of getting a "pink sock" in prison.

Lastly, be there for your girlfriend. Right now, you shouldn't know how to feel. Similarly to her, you probably feel violated and cheated. It also is not your fault. You as a boyfriend shouldn't be expected to be watching over her every second of every day. Don't change how you act or talk to her, let her know if she wants to talk that you're that, but if she doesn't that finds. Then let her know if she wants help seeking counsel, that you can help with that as well. A simple google search can help you find local areas with resources that you may want to harness. Treat her better, go see her and hug her. She may not want to have sexual intercourse with you for a while, accept that and understand it. Do your best to put yourself in her shoes, without thinking about it too much, and understand how she feels. She probably feels humiliated and wrong. Be there for her, hug her and let her cry on your shoulder.

If you or she need anything, just hit me up with a PM, I can give you my number or contact options for people in your area, I am fairly well connected along the east coast if that is where you are from.

 

This.
Thanks a lot for your post man, really lifted my spirits a bit. Honestly, thanks!

 

Man just be there for her and support her through this entire journey. There is no way its going to be easy and there is nothing that you can do other than be there and support her! If you need anything shoot a PM my way!

 

Tell her to go to the police, thats the only option

 

Couldn't have said it better myself, I agree completely with this. ^

My wishes go out to both you and your girlfriend, I really hope you both overcome this situation and become even closer if that's possible.

I dunno what I would do if that happened to me. =|

 

You have to be there for her you have to be her sounding board. Call the police of course Rape is a minimum of 15 years I believe but I would press for more personally. I do have to say though I'm disappointed the news came over text in the aspect I believe that should be a in person conversation.

 

People handle things differently, she felt comfortable telling me over text, I'd much prefer her to be comfortable. I'm glad she told me, rather than keeping it to herself.
It isn't my call to ring the police, no one understands this, shes really upset, the she'll come around in her time & if she chooses to then she does, I now know the guys name, where he lives etc.
I'm not going behind her back & calling the police, thats more stress on her & she doesn't need that right now.

 

ehh he said they live an hour apart so i can understand

make sure the guy gets some jailtime. if he did it to your girlfriend he could definately do it to some one else

 

that's a huge disaster, i hope she's going to be fine. make sure to be with her, support her as much as you can. i find rape more of a trauma than a murder in my opinion. nobody should ever deserve this kind of pain. stay strong buddy

 

Lol you guys are birds banned for what? Banned for telling this guy that is blind as hell reality? I'm going to get banned while theres an incest topic flying around? Forums aren't my life, that's why most of you have'nt even seen a woman naked before. I don't care what you have to say, wae, your probably still a child clearly, don't really care what anyone has to say. This girl probably cheated on him (100%) and if he can't handle the heat, oh well, dont date, dont read my comments, ignore it. This is free speech bud you can't ban everyone over anything. You should grow up, can't give someone all positive comments where did the reality go than, kids.

@niko dont give the guy false hope and wrong ideas, maybe you like to keep girlfriends that cheated on you, thats your issue, either way maybe he can't get another girl and just wants to hear 'oh no , she didn't cheat, she was drunk and got raped'. give him positive thoughts there boy, i ain't, i got tha truth boy, excuse me have you had a girlfriend ? can i see a vouch?

your the one calling me a bitch? will you get banneD? no you donated money cause thats how much you love the internet lelelelel.

 

If you want a straight up answer, report to the police and talk to her about it.

My ex got raped (or claim to be) during my HS year and I know how you feel. It sucks and you just want to run outside and scream to the world but the best way is just to do something else to get your head away from it such as a hobby or doing more work hours. I'm a selfish guy so I let her go because I don't want to deal with her. I later found out the guy who she claim to rape her and he wasn't scare of me, instead he just told me they just had sex and that's it and she wanted to blame him for something. Get your story clear first and don't blame yourself.