Jesus' father.

Petrus was doing his duty at the gates of heaven, when Jesus came to take a look. "Can you take this duty over for a second? I need to take care of some business." Petrus said. Jesus answered "Sure."
"Okay. All you have to do is ask the people who have died a bit about themselves. If they were good people, their job, family members, that kind of stuff."
After saying that, Petrus went on his way and Jesus saw an old man was coming his way.
Jesus asked the old man to sit down, and told him he wanted to ask the man a few questions.
"What was your job on Earth?" Jesus asked.
-"I was a carpenter." the old man answered.
Jesus thought about his past and his father and moved a little bit closer to the old man.
"Okay, did you have any relatives?"
-"I had a son. Thing is.. It didn't require sex to make him, yet I still loved him with all my heart. He had holes in both his hands and his feet.."
Jesus became teary eyed and moved even closer to the old man.
"Father..?" Jesus asked
"Pinnochio?" the old man said.

Sorry for my horrible English. I'm only 16 and from Holland, so that explains it. Had to sort of translate it from Dutch to English.

 

Lol -.-

 

pretty good lol