shy is my biggest problem.

Discussion in 'Personal Support' started by Unregistered11332, Jul 25, 2012.

shy is my biggest problem.
  1. Unread #1 - Jul 25, 2012 at 7:18 PM
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    shy is my biggest problem.

    Hey sythe well im 17 going into 11th grade

    and im not real smooth with the ladys but i do talk to them
    im talking to this girl that i really like and she likes me but when im around
    her im all shy like i talk and everything but i dont have the courage to make a move she wants me to but when i think about doing it im like what if im a bad kisser what if something goes wrong. i make excuses up and she wants more then just a kiss she is well experienced with sex and i still have my v card

    the bottom line is that what should i do to break my shyness im not the same comfortable guy when im around her or around anyone that im not really close friends with.
     
  3. Unread #2 - Jul 26, 2012 at 12:54 PM
  4. Shoop
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    shy is my biggest problem.

    Just go for it.
    I used to be shy when I was younger and I was in the same situation as you. Basically all I did was think "fuck it" and just did what I was afraid to do.

    Get some courage up :p
    I'd say rehearse what you're going to do, but that never works, just go for it and hope for the best :p

    Does she know you're a virgin?
    Girls don't really give a shit if you're a shit kisser or what ever..
     
  5. Unread #3 - Jul 26, 2012 at 1:16 PM
  6. Lilly
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    shy is my biggest problem.

    This biggest issues with people who are shy is that they compare themselves to others, the more you compare yourself to others, you will feel that you are not able to measure up and the more intimidated you will feel, which will make you shyer. The same rule applies to what you think you're not. Who said you're a bad kisser, it's a total self-conscious thought that you must let go of. When you compare yourself to others and attempt to dissect what you think you're not you're going to increase the level of shyness you've developed.

    What you need to do is set goals for yourself. Focus on small, daily accomplishments, then gradually become more daring. Make a list of 10-15 stressful situations, start working through them, one-by-one. The first few "easier" situations will help build your confidence so that you can continue moving to more difficult situations on your list. Set a goal of meeting new people every day, even if you're in the mall, set the goal to introduce yourself to at least one girl a day. A simple "Hi my name is .... and you are" you can tell them to have a nice day after that if you don't wish to converse anymore.

    If you're having issues "making moves" simply come up with an excuse until you've done these methods to overcome your fear. Simply bring up the conversation about making a move and rebuttal with "I don't make the first move until the other person does, so i know what i can get away with ;)".

    Look, act and be approachable. There is no such thing as over confidence.
     
  7. Unread #4 - Jul 27, 2012 at 1:35 AM
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    Chosenn One I'm the guy your parents warned you about.

    shy is my biggest problem.

    Just tell her you're nervous, and you're new to this + you're a virgin.
    Girls sometimes find that cute when a guy confesses his no-experience in regards to relationships.

    I remember I was so shy back in high school that I ran away when the girl I liked spoke to me.
    Eventually, I was just like "ah wth" and just went for it.
    Once you break through that first barrier, the rest will be a walk in the park :)
     
  9. Unread #5 - Jul 27, 2012 at 4:46 AM
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    shy is my biggest problem.

    I lost my Shyness young. I am not very outspoken or loud, but I just realized that there is no reason to be shy because the worst that can happen isn't even really that bad haha.
     
  11. Unread #6 - Jul 27, 2012 at 3:12 PM
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    shy is my biggest problem.

    You're 17, alot of people your age are virgins, more than you might think. Besides, everyone has to lose their virginity some time, and it'll only get more awkward as you get older.
     
  13. Unread #7 - Jul 27, 2012 at 7:18 PM
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    shy is my biggest problem.

    It's not bad to be shy, actually some girls are attracted to shy guys, but if she isn't the case, just go for it, dude. You have nothing to lose.
     
  15. Unread #8 - Aug 5, 2012 at 8:29 AM
  16. 0belisk
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    shy is my biggest problem.

    Shyness is something you get better with with time, and at 17, you can't expect to be the most confident guy out there, but in my opinion they are things you can do to build your confidence and become less shy, you have to break it down to basics.

    For example, if you feel good, you act good, you seem good. By this i mean you need to work on your ego, i am NOT saying become an arrogant bastard far from it, but i mean whats the main thing you notice from arrogant guys, CONFIDENCE, you need to develop a sense of this without becoming a snob.

    How to build confidence and develop an non-arrogant ego? This is where you break it down to basics, there are many things that without you noticing, will affect your shyness, such as:

    1.) Your clothes. If your wearing your worst top, your worst pair of trousers, naturally you won't be feeling that good walking down the street or feel like bumping into any girls let alone talking to them.

    If your get in the habit of always making sure your wearing nice clothes, looking fresh/sharp, matching clothes or a good combination, you'll notice your body language as a whole changes, because you feel comfortable within yourself, it will greatly increase your posture just by doing this one thing, making you feel much more comfortable talking to that girl.

    2.) Your hair, a lot of people confidence these days seem to originate from their hair, some of my mates can go from being the most cockiest arrogant guy when he's proper styled up his hair and feels like a million pound, then the next day he may be lazy and cba to do it and won't even go to the shop because he thinks he aint looking good. Find yourself a hair style that suits you and stick to it, its similar to the clothes points, you'll feel more confident by feeling comfortable with your appearance and lust reduces that shy feeling and will develop a sense of ego, looking in the mirror like "damn i look good" thats what you need.

    3.) Smelling good is important, find yourself a nice aftershave that suits you and everyday when your going out put some on your neck, and a little bit on your shirt, every time a girl notices your aftershave and compliments it, its an ego boost, and a lot of girls LOVE for a guy to smell good, a lot of aftershaves to the right girl is seductive as well, hypnotising, look into it, imagine you bump into her and you go all shy, she turns round and goes mmm you smell nice what aftershave is it? instant conversation starter and breaks the shy barrier for you.

    4.) No-one likes bad breath, and if someone turns round to you and says your breath reeks, thats gonna kill your confidence on the spot and make things awkward, last thing you want is to be trying to chat up that girl for her to cringe in front of you and say wtf have you eaten, whenever going out brush them teeth just prior to leaving, just having the knowledge that your breath is always smelling nice and not having to worry about it, will again reduce your shyness and improve confidence.

    These are many more points to take into consideration but it will take me forever to explain everything to you, a lot of these points may seem like their stating the obvious but trust me its all very important and relevant. If you start mastering these 4 points, i can promise you, you'll walk into school/college or whatever feeling MUCH more confident, your shyness will be greatly reduced, remember if you feel good, you act good and seem good, its no lie. These 4 points will help you improve your posture and your sense of aura.

    A lot of this you may already know or be using but i bet you never think about it, and thinking about it will great help. say your in class, you see her, you look at your hair - looking good, look at your clothes - looking fresh, remember you brushed those teeth - set to go, you smell your shirt - smelling handsome. you'll get a sense you've done everything correct and have no reason to be shy, now go say hello and display your newly found confidence.
     
  17. Unread #9 - Aug 5, 2012 at 8:44 AM
  18. Imagine
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    shy is my biggest problem.

    I also used to really shy, but like shoop said, just think "fuck it".

    To be honest, you have to realize that what other people think of you doesn't matter. Once I realized that, I became generally much happier. I have no problem telling people to go fuck themselves, and it really reflects. Sure you'll make a few enemies, but having self confidence will instantly make you more attractive, and help you make a move.

    I realize this is a little long (the post) but tl;dr is to just think "fuck it" and if it goes wrong not give a shit about what she thinks.
     
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