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my first freestyle !

Discussion in 'Music' started by Rhino, Dec 12, 2007.

?

How good was I?

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  1. Rhino

    Rhino Guru
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    my first freestyle !
    heres teh link


    http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default.cfm?bandID=781689


    waring lil wayne style freestyle



    here are my lyrics and yes i made both my beats via fruity loops :p

    rate /10

    thnx :p also post how i can improve.
     
    Rhino, Dec 12, 2007
    #1
  2. Shattered Reflection

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    my first freestyle !
    you seem like your not trying to talk loud.

    It's ok. Sounds like your more talking.
     
    Shattered Reflection, Dec 12, 2007
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  3. zuKi

    zuKi Active Member
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    my first freestyle !
    Its ok, but try to talk little faster
     
    zuKi, Dec 12, 2007
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  4. Rhino

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    my first freestyle !
    ill work on that this time ima write it :p
     
    Rhino, Dec 12, 2007
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  5. Sir_juelz

    Sir_juelz Guest

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    my first freestyle !
    A: the beat sucks
    B: your style stinks
    C: talk louder
    D: rap about what you truly mess with
    E: A for effort

    rap = 6/10
     
    Sir_juelz, Dec 12, 2007
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  6. Rhino

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    my first freestyle !
    thnx My first try i was kinda nervous :)
     
    Rhino, Dec 12, 2007
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  7. jaamal

    jaamal Guru

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    my first freestyle !
    5/10 You need to deliver the punchlines, even if you can't rap you can perform it well... (Example= Lil John)
     
    jaamal, Dec 12, 2007
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  8. Rhino

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    my first freestyle !
    lol lil john

    ok ill do it next time
     
    Rhino, Dec 12, 2007
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  9. Sex_bot

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    my first freestyle !
    put more vocal into it.. speed it up and get agressive dood..
     
    Sex_bot, Dec 13, 2007
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  10. Rhino

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    my first freestyle !
    ok ill work on it
     
    Rhino, Dec 13, 2007
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  11. Cucumber

    Cucumber Active Member

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    my first freestyle !
    No... sounds like you are just reading it off the paper
     
    Cucumber, Dec 13, 2007
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  12. Rhino

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    my first freestyle !
    i wasent :) and if i was wudent you think id sount slower? i was kida saying it with a deepish voice..
    .
     
    Rhino, Dec 13, 2007
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  13. peanuts

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    my first freestyle !
    not bad, i would make my own beats using an actual synthesiser/keyboard and sequence it using a better prog like cubase, also your not putting yourself in it your just talking, one negative comment, i dont like that gun cocking sound every 2 secs. other than that is was ok, 7/10
     
    peanuts, Dec 13, 2007
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  14. Rhino

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    my first freestyle !
    thnx and lol :p its every 1.3secs lol
     
    Rhino, Dec 13, 2007
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  15. Cucumber

    Cucumber Active Member

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    my first freestyle !
    Wanna audio battle?
     
    Cucumber, Dec 13, 2007
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  16. hm0ng

    hm0ng Grand Master

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    my first freestyle !
    THis isn't an actual "FREESTYLE". It sounds more like "reading of a peice of paper". Also, that's a shit song. Choose a better beat. 5/10 for the effort.
     
    hm0ng, Dec 13, 2007
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  17. Rhino

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    my first freestyle !
    cu i would my mic broke or i wuda been updated my beats n styles

    beat is originaly made by me and it was a freestyle
     
    Rhino, Dec 13, 2007
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  18. Tumma

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    my first freestyle !

    I'd agree with most of this, but who says you need to rap about what you truly mess with?

    Many rappers rap about how hard the life is in the "hood" while they live in extremely luxurious mansions.

    ~Tumma.
     
    Tumma, Dec 17, 2007
    #18
  19. MosDef

    MosDef Apprentice

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    my first freestyle !
    umm honestly I think the beat was HORRIBLE, next time use an instrumental from a professional like 9th Wonder, Premo, or Pete rock.

    the lyrics were decent but you should work on your pronunciation and your flow, cos during certain parts you were terribly off beat.

    stay up, kid
     
    MosDef, Dec 17, 2007
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  20. Rhino

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    my first freestyle !
    thnx i will as soo nas i rebuy a damn mic lmao
     
    Rhino, Dec 17, 2007
    #20
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