Does Highschool end?..

So i am a freshman in college, and i was expecting the college atmosphere to be way different then high school. Meaning less clique orientated. But boy was i wrong, during freshman orientation people were out going and kind to each other everyone seemed to be striving to make friends. But now that we are about 4 Weeks into the first semester everyone seems to be going back to their roots of exclusion. I feel this is a self esteem boosting natural human mechanism. You can only feel better about your self once you can say someone else is not cool enough to hangout with you or be apart of your group. By denying this person access to the group the person who denied them now feels superior. I believe this is basic human instinct. I do not believe it is done intentionally just what happens.

Now to clear things up, i am not a loser, i do not feel that i am out side the "popular" group in my dorm building. I just choice to spend more time off campus in my friends house where i can chill in Air conditioning and Rip GBs until I fall on my face .

Anyways i guess this is a question to the older users of sythe do you see the same trends that i do ? How highschool seems to never end ? Even past college , in work places etc.

Thanks for your feed back. ​

 

Well, you are right. What is success but a compilation of other's failure? Whatever you do, you do it because you gain something. Notice that people are more likely to donate to charity if the charity offers a gift for the donation.

 

That is true, now another question: is any person genuinely good or does everyone act out of self-interest. Even if self-interest is to avoid embarrassment, or save themselves from guilt.

Example: If a person finds a wallet, if they choose to return it, do they do it because they know its the right thing to do, or do they return to avoid feeling guilty later ?

 

I don't have that problem at my college. You can make friends with anyone. I don't live in residence, but I go there to party sometimes and everyone is pretty much open to meeting new people. You can walk up to a group and talk to them as if they were your friends.

Perhaps you're being paranoid. Have you ever tried just approaching a group and talking to them? (in a classroom, or after classes in the dorms).

 

Well when I was a freshman, I was very shy and was always excluded from everyone. I was pretty depressed and upset all the time. Then my sophmore year, my "social status" sky rocketed, because I guess I made friends with the right kids. Now I am probably one of the most outgoing kids you will meet, but I see kids who are in the same situation I was, so I always do my best to talk to everyone and include everyone so no one feels left out or excluded, because I know how shitty it feels, and my ego doesn't get boosted at all by ignoring them.

 

Im not saying that, im not afraid to try and make friends, i guess i didnt make my point clearly. During freshman orientation EVERYONE would say hi to everyone. It seemed everyone was overly friendly. But now, I still say hi to everyone i pass walking back to my dorm and most of the time i get ignored.

I dont feel that i am an out cast or anything. I tend to make friends with everyone because i think of my self as well rounded and i can connect with a large variety of people.

I made this post to talk about society as a whole , and how people need to feel better about them selves; using exclusion as that source of ego boosting.

 

In College even all the shy, introverted kids make tons of friends..

 

Not saying that. But the fact that people inevitably form cliques and social groups etc..

I guess a term i'd use to describe it as social politics or something.

 

I don't see the problem, lol. Do you have any close friends?

 

Yes quite a few. Im just taking a sociological approach to it. Im viewing it as a non bias individual, just stating some patterns that i noticed about the first few weeks of school.

 

Yeah well sometimes that shit happens. You will eventually learn to not give a fuck when it comes to those situations.

Add people on facebook whenever you can, talk to people with similar interests, initiate/organize events like lan parties or inviting people to play video games or some pool at a local pub.

I read somewhere that most people are reluctant/too lazy to initiate a friend request on facebook. Don't be that guy.

 

Lol , i actually lol'd at the too lazy part. Also i think people feel inferior when they have to add people on facebook. Again, i do no have problems meeting people, i am just merely stating trends that i have noticed.

 

i am in college and i see no resemblance to highschool, but it could be my state , more southern charm i guess

 

Im from new jersey, could be the nature of the people too. Good point.

 

Alright, lemme put it this way ...




Says it all tbh

Jersey people, let's just say aren't the most friendly people imo.

 

The difference from high school to college is astounding. It takes some freshman longer than others to knock the cocky "I was the shit" in high school attitude, but it happens eventually.

About cliques and groups, how can you even tell? There is 20,000+ undergrads at most Universities, not everyone can fit into one friends group!

 

My school has about 9,000. I was strictly talking about my dorm.. which is freshman only.

 

No highschool never ends, get used to it. I'm 22 and from the adults I've worked with they still go through the same shit as 14 year old's. And also who gives a fuck about cliques half of them will end up with drug and alcohol problems so why waste your time being friends with only one group when that nerd only you from your dorm was friends with becomes the next Gill Bates and you end up cruising the Atlantic Ocean with playboy playmates just because you were nice to some nerd in college. Always remember life throws you curve balls so if you're nice to everyone even you enemies great things might occur. OR you get right @#$@! over and nothing great ever happens because you were a complete d-bag in college to everyone except your small group of friends who grow up to go no-where and all you're left with is fri-sun waking up hung over as s@#$ with the "cool" kids from college.

That's my 2 cents pick it up or leave it on the sidewalk but really enjoy them years get to know everyone, have fun, and by all means don't be a hater because someones different coloured, speaks different, or dresses differently, just have fun.

 

Though it is rare, it exists. Notably; Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Theresa, etc. If people were more like this, we would be in a much better place.

As for the original question, "college life" is totally different here in New Zealand, or at least how I see it portrayed in the media. We don't have college dorms, college parties, etc. Most people are either flatting or still remain at home. "American college life" is one thing I'd always like to experience.

 

I am getting this same thing, but not most of the time being ignored. I'm starting to get ignored when i say hey or nod my head at people, but thats just how it is I guess. I've yet to make REAL friends here that I hang out with. Its getting to be suckish. I guess it'll all happen over time.