Lack of Motivation/Bad Addiction

I've been gaming for the past 12 years. Each time I play a game (mainly MMOs or RTS) I wanted to get somewhere. I used to play Starcraft 2 Wings of liberty professionally, I hit top 8 Masters and wanted to become a professional player but that went out the window then Starcraft 2 lost popularity.

I then pursued yu-gi-oh the card game. I wanted to win and be a strong player and maybe qualify for Regionals, but my deck got stolen along with all my valuable cards + camera so I quit.

I went to Runescape thinking that I couldn't lose. But my main got hacked and bot-busted so Jagex doesn't unban. I bought an account from here and it was recovered. I wanted to just boss, I loved the feeling of getting drops. I wanted the MAX gear. But I was never able to get it.

I feel like I can't focus on anything but games, knowing that I never reached where I wanted to be is causing me to fail college because I dont have any motivation to study or do well because I just wanted one thing in my life that I could pick up and play and be satisfied with where I was and not have to constantly focus on it so I could focus on school.

I feel like its an addiction towards gaming or some sort. I'm only 18 but I'm living with my parents still and I do have a girlfriend but I have this emptiness inside with whatever I worked towards for such a long time is just gone and I could never experience the end goal of what I wanted to do with it.

 

Although it's good to be goal-oriented, it's bad to be too goal-oriented. Don't be too bummed out because you didn't reach your goal. It's about the journey/experience and the fun you got while chasing your goal.

Why not look into console gaming? Most of the games there never really lose popularity all that much, there's always people enjoying older games. Online games go through the decline in popularity overtime and sometimes drastically. LoL is pretty big right now and competitive, maybe you can look into being great there? If you enjoy playing video games and want to do that as a career, pursue it but if you don't see yourself doing that, focus on what you feel like you'll like to do as a career (be it through school, work, etc)

Good luck.

 

I just wanted something that I could be proud of. I worked hard and made this, or made it this far.

 

I was once extremely addicted to Runescape. That was in junior high / early highschool. I ignored the addiction, instead I gamed, so for most of the rest of my time in highschool my parents decided that I would be grounded from the internet (changed the pass) and had my laptop confiscated usually for month intervals or longer. I then purchased a cheap ass $100 laptop and used the neighbors unprotected WiFi to play Runescape and eventually found out the house password and used it without the parents knowledge.

I also played yu-gi-oh when it was popular back before there were 20 sequels or even 1. I had a lot of friends in elementary that played it as well but I was always a beast and could win any duel, I eventually sold the 10 thousand + cards that I owned because I was strapped for cash and since then have been buying them for nostalgic reasons even though I doubt I will be able to play the game again.

I realize that all of this effected my life as well as anyone that was somewhat close to me or would never be because I decided to stay inside and just play my games instead of going out and doing stuff with people. This has played a part in molding who I am today, and if I could change it I would push my fat ass out the door to get some sun the first day I created a Runescape account. To this day I am still what I would consider a shut in, although I have met people much worse but regardless of the severity it comes down to the same thing. I think I am the way I am because of what was drilled into my head growing up, leading me to stay away from people and instead become absorbed into the internet of possibilities.

I have no idea if what you are doing is effecting or will effect you negatively in your future as it has mine, but as far as college goes if you aren't willing to take it seriously finish your semester and come back when you think you can handle it. Get some hands on training in the field you want to go into and comeback to college when ready or even better when your work will pay for it. Unless of course you are paying for college with grant money from the government, milk that shit, and just try harder. Education may seem like obstacle now but once you hit the real world unless you are amazing at what you do, you'll probably wish you had paid more attention and put more effort into it rather than a game.

Remember, you are the future. If your passion is gaming, go into video game design. Make gaming into exactly what you want out of it, don't skip corners, just get the job done. If college isn't the right place for you, use the internet, the biggest source of free knowledge and self help ever. Anything you can learn in a classroom can be found from a quick Google search, and in a lot of my classes at least Google is my only teacher.

For now I would suggest taking a day or 2 break per week/month if you don't already. Go out and do something, exercise, focus on your homework, study, just don't get caught up into gaming for that day and see where it leads. Also dedicating a certain time of day each day or every other day or whatever, if even for 15 minutes to do a couple homework problems, read the chapter, whatever it may be, should help start the focus onto the educational path you are on and hopefully it grows over time to where you don't have to think about it anymore. I see enough kids drop out of college, and I just don't understand it. You pay to be somewhere that you don't take seriously and instead just give up, although out of a lot of colleges you only get the piece of paper at the end of the road they still "give" you the tools, books, and references to better understand what you are doing in the field you are in. Good Luck, hope that helped at all. Somewhat hypocritical on my end, but I would hate to see anyone become me.

 

The first step is to understand why you need it; it wouldn't be an addiction unless it was somehow rewarding.

The monster drops are easy - that's just a traditional form of gambling. Quick psych 101 lesson: Put a mouse in a box and teach it to pull a lever to get food. If you reward the mouse every time it pulls the lever, it will do so every so often, but eventually become satiated and stop. If you reward the mouse every three times it pulls the lever, the mouse will pick up the pattern and do the same. But, if you reward the mouse on a completely random schedule, the mouse will perform the task obsessively, well after it's full and tired. Rationally, it makes no sense, but there's something about a random reward that's inherently addictive. That's why gambling is such a widespread vice.

But there's obviously more to it. Wanting to be the best at all of these games - and not just any games, but social games, in particular, would seem to suggest that you either want people to envy you, or you simply want the attention that you receive from other players. It's something I think a lot of RS players have in common. After all, there's not much that's inherently fun about clicking and dragging over and over again, nor about botting as much as you can feasibly get away with.

I had several close friends that were top 10, top 20, and they were great friends, but they tended to be more socially awkward and insecure; I think the game was largely a way for them to deal with these issues. At times, I think I did the same. There's also a reason that people form OCD habits; repetition, however dull, can be soothing, and it keeps your mind off of other things.

Obviously, only you know whether any of this applies to you, but whereas gambling addictions are fairly straight-forwarded, your addiction sounds to be more of a symptom than the problem.

 

All these gents (and ladies, if there are any) made very good points. Here's what I can tell you though, you can fall in love with a lot of different things. I'm a grown ass woman at 23, and I've been gaming since I was 12. I'm on the computer almost at least 8+ hours a day, but I've graduated uni, doing a post-graduate degree and I have a job I adore doing (and I can tell you that this job has nothing to do with gaming)-- you can have the same thing too. It's all about striking a balance and letting yourself be immersed on a different aspect of what you love.

I love online gaming and the communication I have with other people online. See what I've done there? There's gaming, and there's communication. I love interacting with people and inspiring them, giving them a different perspective on a lot of things on their lives (which is why I'm currently teaching in a uni here in my country).

Perhaps, you should do the same too? If you are as goal oriented as your thread suggests you to be, which I believe that you are, how about the other end of the gaming spectrum? Games have two. You're either the gamer or the developer AND the gamer. But at least now you get bragging rights not to just have beaten the game so easily but because you helped develop it.

You're young and there's a lot of things that could happen, it's exactly the time where you take risks to figure out what you want to be doing with your life.

 

I can't really take risks right now, my parents have a set path for me at the Uni, get a Nursing Degree, become a nurse. Anything other than that path gets me kicked out of my house. And I can't really afford that to happen right now. I do love gaming, I've tried developing games but I was stopped by my father because he didn't want me to, he wanted me to go down an easier path a more sure path.

 

You have to realize your father is from a different generation than you are. Just before the giant information boom, medical careers were the go-to field of work.

Our parents generation, for the most part, isn't aware of current trends and the way that they are shaping our future. You can try showing him recent statistics on medical vs computer science careers in an intelligent and peaceful manner.

 

If your're still interested in professional gaming, try the new Mortal Kombat X. Came out 2 days ago, averaging ~20k views on twitch. Try it for ps4 or pc if you wanna try the competitive scene again.

 

counter strike global offensive seems to be getting more and more popular by the day

gl with everything bud, take it easy!

 

Thank you all for your support, I've been able to talk through this with my gf, but I'm far too afraid to confront my parents or tell them anything yet. They're pushing me to get a job. And the last 5 interviews within the last 3 years tells me that I might never get a job. I lack references and experience and I just broke down crying in class because I got an email from an company saying that they were going to choose other candidiates after I thought was the best interview of my life. Its really killing me that I can't even land a simple cashier job at 19 years.

 

why not get experience from helping out as a volunteer in certain workplaces

 

You have to pass interviews and have references for that. They don't take volunteers out of the blue and it wouldn't be that outstanding compared to an actual job.

 

Maybe try taking up another hobby to distract yourself from gaming!

 

Nothing gives me the same satisfaction.

 

runescape IS an addiction for everyone, the only time i managed to quit it or take a break is when i starting playing black ops 1 with my friends, i managed to quit rs for about 2 years then. I'm now back playing rs as im addicted aswell, it fucks up my studying and social life but thats just how it is.

imo just find another game thats fun and doesnt require to much dedication, eg cod, halo or cs go

 

Unfortunately this member was banned, but what I would have recommended to him is to workout! People don't understand how helpful working out is, not only are you making yourself healthier physically but also mentally! It distracts you from bad hobbies, creates a new one and gives you a feeling of accomplishment.

 

Totally agree man..

 

You need to grow up and learn your priorities and base your hobbies around them.

 

I also struggle with similar issues.