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Discussion in 'Personal Support' started by pur3bloody, Aug 18, 2014.

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  1. Unread #1 - Aug 18, 2014 at 6:03 PM
  2. pur3bloody
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  3. Unread #2 - Aug 18, 2014 at 7:37 PM
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    Sounds like FWB or open. Ask for clarification to make sure you're on the same page and you are fine with it.
     
  5. Unread #3 - Aug 18, 2014 at 10:31 PM
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    She wants to play around and experiment. She probably feels really restricted by you. From the way she describes it, it seems like you're the type thats always thinking of the future and not living the now.

    Honestly, just feels like she wants to break up but I dont know all the details
     
  7. Unread #4 - Aug 18, 2014 at 10:42 PM
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    I asked her if she wanted to break up when we were talking and she said if she did, she wouldn't be with me. And I did ask for clarification and she said "idk"
     
  9. Unread #5 - Aug 19, 2014 at 3:35 AM
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    Basically no strings attatched. She's not only committed to you.
     
  11. Unread #6 - Aug 19, 2014 at 4:16 AM
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    Sounds like you spoiled her and friend-zoned yourself after you got into a relationship.

    School just started up and she wants to explore other options, not to bring you down but you were most likely a summer attraction and now she has a lot more possibilities which you also now have.
     
  13. Unread #7 - Aug 19, 2014 at 6:34 AM
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    She obviously LIKES you, but must feel confined within the relationship (if you already have one). I used to be like that with girls. I'd like them, but I'd want to be more free to do whatever I'd like.

    Try talking with her about whatever's going on within that subject that makes her want to have an open/care free relationship.
     
  15. Unread #8 - Aug 19, 2014 at 4:56 PM
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    Jlve, I am 22, she is 19, we aren't in school. And Mo0n, idk man, she said that stuff yesterday, then last night we talked a little again and I was like "how come a few weeks ago you said you wanted a relationship and to find love, but now you say you want a fun and carefree relationship?" She said "why can't I have all three?" She was also saying how if I ever do anything with another girl, even kissing, she'll rip both our heads off and she said she wouldn't cheat on me and she said she won't cheat on me unless she has a reason to. She's cheated on guys in the past she said but apparently only because they cheated first. She always hugs me and says "mine" and shit like that and says that I'm her man, so that's why idk what she meant by fun and carefree lol, she's got my head all twisted and it's annoying -.-. I asked her why she has to do this shit, she says she likes seeing me squirm and she wants me wrapped around her finger lol. She also said something else last night that entails she wants to be in a serious relationship, I forget what she said, but I was like "Wtf? Earlier you said you didn't want to be in a relationship and you just wanted a fun and carefree one, and now you say that, make up your damn mind." And she laughed. Oh, and she said that in a relationship she isn't touchy feely and she's kind of distant, so after our first talk yesterday we laid in bed all day and watched netflix, and I wasn't touching her that much and she kept looking at me wondering why I wasn't, and I was like "You said you weren't touchy feely and I'm giving you your distance" She's like "oh shut up" grabs my arm and puts it around her. So I honestly do not know what she wants. She is harder to read than any woman I've ever encountered.

    Oh, I forgot to mention, yesterday during our talk she said our goals aren't the same because she doesn't want to have a kid or get married. But she's friends with my sister and always says to my sister, "what's the point of being in a relationship if you don't plan on ever getting married." So I told her that yesterday and said my sister told me what she said and she just smiled and knew I was right. She also always jokes around with me about being pregnant and I always rub her stomach and say that my twins are in there and she actually enjoys it and yesterday she was like "Thank god I'm not pregnant, I don't think you'd be a good dad." But she was joking and started laughing and said that if she was to get pregnant then we'd have to stay together. We only had sex once and she said she hasn't been in the mood recently, idk what's up with that either because she loves to have sex she said. I fear that maybe she's getting it elsewhere but she promises that she isn't. Ughhhh so much stress
     
  17. Unread #9 - Aug 20, 2014 at 8:55 AM
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    The way she says that she has you wrapped around her finger really scares me. Are you actually in love with this girl? It basically seems to me that she doesn't give two shits about you and your feelings, and just uses you to pleasure her.
     
  19. Unread #10 - Aug 20, 2014 at 11:02 AM
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    You sure she isn't pregnant? Sounds like she's having mood swings.

    Either way, that's not the type of person you want to get serious with.
     
  21. Unread #11 - Aug 20, 2014 at 9:07 PM
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    I'll agree with Ghast on that one, at least not seriously. It sounds to me like she's interested in someone else but perhaps isn't sure whether she's more interested in you or the other person. My guess is that it's probably the other person and she doesn't have the heart to tell you. As with all things, time will tell, but my advice is to not invest yourself too seriously in her. If she's not into a relationship with you, don't force her to be or get upset over the fact that it's not meant to be. Life is long; don't beat yourself up over one person.
     
  23. Unread #12 - Aug 20, 2014 at 9:10 PM
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    What king said. It sounds like she's almost just playing a game with you or using you. I'd be super cautious.
     
  25. Unread #13 - Aug 20, 2014 at 9:39 PM
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    If she honestly said she likes seeing you squirm and having you wrapped around her finger, she is not a keeper. It sounds like you are looking for a serious relationship and this definitely isn't one. Sounds like she is purposely saying stuff to mess with your mind because she enjoys feeling empowered. If you want it to be a serious relationship, tell her straight up. Otherwise why are you wasting time?
     
  27. Unread #14 - Aug 21, 2014 at 1:11 AM
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    After reading your updated post, I would turn the tables on this chick. Leave her hangin', don't seem interested in anything she does, then watch her "squirm" trying to please you. Thats just me though, and some people might not agree. Then after the you layout that ground work, ask her straight up if she's playin' you - cause if she is, you won't waste your time with her (as everyone else says). Let us know, best of luck pal.
     
  29. Unread #15 - Aug 21, 2014 at 5:26 PM
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    Yeah, some shit went down yesterday, and now, I'm just going to be distant with her and I'm going to see if she cares enough to try at the relationship and if she will do anything to make it work. I'm done trying. But at the same time, I don't want her thinking that I'm not interested in her, and push her away. I ask her all the time if she wants to be together or not and she says yes so apparently she isn't playing me. I've broken up with her a few times, whenever I do, we talk, and then she says she wants to be with me so we get back together. She won't be touchy feely with me, but then last night when I was having a serious conversation with her and I was crying a little (not hysterically, and yes I was drunk) She wouldn't really talk much, I was the one doing all the talking she was just nodding her head and saying mhmm and stuff like that, and she wouldn't stop kissing me the whole time and then she rode me.
     
  31. Unread #16 - Aug 22, 2014 at 10:14 AM
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    Yourve gota step up and just tell her what and how you feel and what you want to happen.. Most relationships get ruined because bad communication or not understanding.. If you want the relationship than sit her down and tell her to open up to you otherwise end it..

    Its not worth all the dramas if your not happy... And when a girl says she wants fun in a relationship basically means open. Shes probably trying her chances with others without you knowing and if things dont work out at least she knows shes got you to come back to.. I know this cause im a girl and i went through a simular phaze when i was at school..

    But all the best to you.
     
  33. Unread #17 - Aug 23, 2014 at 8:10 PM
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    She sounds extremely indecisive, which is one of the most frustrating things to deal with in a relationship. My last girlfriend was exactly the same way and that's what ruined our relationship. Honestly I don't think it's going to last and you should start working on trying to separate yourself from her emotionally, so when you two do break up, it won't be too much of a surprise and you won't get that hurt. Just enjoy the time you have with her right now, but don't expect on you two getting married or being together for several years because it's most likely not going to happen.
     
  35. Unread #18 - Aug 23, 2014 at 8:36 PM
  36. pur3bloody
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    Exactly how I'm feeling right now dime, pretty sure I'm doing that
     
  37. Unread #19 - Aug 23, 2014 at 9:43 PM
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    What have you decided to do, pure?
     
  39. Unread #20 - Aug 25, 2014 at 11:56 AM
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    I've broken up with her three times, every time she makes me come back over, and she fucks me and we stay together. This time, she broke up with me today and I just said okay. She's not ready for a relationship in my eyes so I don't really care. I'm done with relationships, just gonna fuck bitches

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