Sent Unlawfully to a mental Insitution & learned how to meditate.

IDK if this belongs here or in personal support but here it is,

I have told many people about what I have heard from KRS-one which is that what we are calling Oxygen, is actually God. Conciousness, our ability to be aware. We are not concious unto ourselves, we are receiving conciousness by breathing. This gift from god, is why they are cutting all the trees down... to lessen your ability to think.

Go ahead and be sceptical but I now have taken this theory even deeper because my parents locked me up in a mental institution for basically doing nothing (f*** living in a flouridated community of ignorant doctors who collect patients like pokemon cards). They have machines which refine the air, and my breath has become significantly more shallow since entering. I have also gotten really sick and bursting pains throughout my body (upper left/right chest, in my head, ribs, etc). I think this has to do with aspergers and I'm more sensitive to the [toxic?] environment.

I can tell the people here all seem allot more sensitive. Less coordinated. My Imagination is very hard to control, in dreams as well as in conversation. Was kind-of crazy how hard it is to control the repetitive music in your head due to lack of oxygen.

I refuse to take medication (which angers them) since it's against my way of life. They threaten me lots though. I refuse to sing here or listen to music in my head because that would make my expression look happy, & the way people "magnetically look at me" and I am kind-of a trend setter, I don't want newcomers to think this place is actually enjoyable.

It seems like there is so little oxygen (Kundalini aspects of anahata Chakra including "right to love", "sense: touch", "lungs & heart", etc)... that perhaps Self takes over (Kundalini aspects of Manipura chakra including "right to think", "sense: eyesight", "digestion", etc).

A way of meditation I recently learned before coming here was to just "sit and be", basically exist & perhaps you will see the blackness of your eyes, but eventually (being unprevoked into change) start to feel your body as one unified thing. Don't focus on the breath, just do it naturally without thinking. Don't force your thoughts off, just don't allow yourself to continue them. When your legs are too numb to continue (or whatever you like), then lay down in Yoga Corpse Pose.

It's kind-of sad because I'm missing all the Kundalini Yoga I used to enjoy every day... but at least I have this new extremely useful way to free me from my own thoughts.

If I have repetitive music in my head before a meal, it will get worse... so I must meditate first. Infact I spend most of my time here just simply existing, but it has taught me how to avoid others peircing gaze and just act "polite enough" while still keeping my eyes away from the people. They said I'd be here 1 day, then 3, then 1 month, then 2 months, now they are saying if my weight doesn't go up it will be 6 months.

It's crazy though and I have to wait 2 weeks to get a court date because they are so backed up. I learned to just keep my mouth shut and be unspoken most of the time because if I act smart they just want to keep me here. All the workers try to find excuses to talk to me it is driving me insane. The doctor/psychiatrist are even trying to get on my good side because they know people don't like them, & my opinion would be very affective against them.

Any ways Here's the full video about the truth about god.

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still trying to keep my heart clean of hate & revenge.

 

I really dont know what to make of the situation youre in, its unfortunate but all i can say is to stay strong in what you know and your being. I watched the entire KRS ONE video and it has alot of key things to know, and has changed my perspective on a lot of things. To me it seems like you know what youre doing as far as spirituality goes. Just keep doing what youre doing, stay strong spiritually, mentally and stay in a state opposite of that which is pressed on you.

 

It's fucked up because soem mental institutions might be purposely fucking up patients in order to make them stay longer. Giving them drugs that make them psychotic basically.. ya never know.

 

Lay off the drugs.

 

I have read this post and this isn't me trolling but being completely honest. From your post you sound extremely paranoid. Extreme paranoia can be a sign of schizophrenia, and that can be brought on my many things. It can be caused by some drugs, brain injuries, or it could just be something that you are born with which means it could possibly be linked to your aspbergers. This is just looking at your post logically and the way you have explained things:

I am not going to try to reason with you, or even argue with you about. I am just presenting this to you from my perspective and logic.

 

How should I put this. If you feel a lack of oxygen in your environment, ask a nurse to bring in an oxygen test because you currently feel uncomfortable.
They won't mind, I'm sure of it. If you still feel uncomfortable, you may be able to convince a nurse to bring in a can of oxygen and slowly release it in your room.

 

I think i agree with Emperor in that your way of writing doesn't seem very normal. But i don't think that you should be kept in this mental institution as long as you're not hurting yourself or anyone else.

Just a question, how did you get to sythe forums? Were you a part of this before you were sent away and now just continue to use it? Do you have access to computers and internet in this place?

Just curious.

 

It's good to hear that the video helped you. I will try hard to stay strong even though it's so hard when everyone seems to be trying to inflate your Ego just with their whole exsessive expression they use when talking with me... even though they are probably technically my enemies (but I don't know that forsure) they still seem to respect my success.

Even the main doctor changed his attitude towards me probably because of the power I have by simply existing here (the one trying to force me drugs now because he thinks it could change my mind about my "dillusions" about the affects of flouride on your pineal gland & how I don't want to eat microwaved plastic meals)

Yepp, if they don't take the medication they pretty much are garanteed to end up losing their privelages to leave the Unit. If you get side affects from the drugs they give you more drugs to manage the side affects.

I may seem abnormal to some, but not paranoid. This is because a paranoid person can't choose to creatively imagine up a "idea of paranoia" and have the decision to keep the idea or throw it away.

I know when there's a "scam", it's usually not meant for just one person even though it may seem that way they would actually try to fool multiple people who get caught in the same situation.

I had very little time to type this... & yes they have computers here and other activities you can go to but I have to be supervised so I don't get much time.

I am not doing any drugs. Herb makes me think too much, personally.

 

Not trolling here, but I didn't know they allowed computers or such in institutions? Just curious.

 

How old are you?
From what date to what date were you there?
Did you browse on sythe when there?
How is your relationship with your parents?

 

In this one they do.

I'm 20, I've been here since December 27th, 2011. I have browsed sythe while here, yes... and I have a good relationship with my parents even though our way of living is quite different (they are mormon, I am a rasta).
___________

Update on my situation... well I had a chance to take them to Queens Bench to appeal the decision the hospital made to keep me here, but as it would be my 3rd review I decided against it. My personality has been pretty much completely erased by living in these conditions... I have practically gone through rebirth (except part of my memory is still in tact).

My parents want me out of here as well now, they are somewhat understanding of why I hate this place... because loads of the staff are completely wacko and controlling and hungry for power over others. There are some okay nurses though. They want me put in this new section of the hospital, and I would love to be there because the windows open so there is actually a good ammount of air to breath. I could start doing yoga again, which would be great with the breathing excersizes. I lost the will-power to meditate in this enviroment awhile ago because of lack of breath. The doctor says "I will never be normal" and therefore in his opinion should always stay in here because of my belief about there being less air flow in here, but that's just ridiculous and hopefully I don't have to stay here long for that reason (before I would go to court).

 

Is it even legal to keep someone there against their will? Since you said your parents want you out of there now cant they fight to get you out or withdraw you?

 

Not if there is a chance that the person will hurt themselves or someone else. Just reading this guys posts it seems like he could be a danger to himself, it appears that he is highly delusion. I mean if a person is sensible and competent then it is against the law to hold them against their will but if, by medical opinion, they're not competent then it is a liability to release them.

I mean marijuana has been known to cause psychosis, it happens very rarely but it happens.

Edit: You also have to consider with this we are only getting one half of a story here, so there is more than what we are seeing here.